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312: Leadership’s Tough Questions with Vince Molinaro

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Vince Molinaro says: "Once you're in a leadership role, that's got to be your main thing."

Vince Molinaro diagnoses recurring problems in leaders today, the mindset of a great leader, and what it really takes to deliver accountable and  transformative leadership.

You’ll Learn:

  1. The four key terms of the leadership contract
  2. Why having tough conversations is so important
  3. Steps to being an accountable leader who gets the best out of people

About Vince

Vince Molinaro experienced a defining moment early in his career when he saw a respected colleague and mentor succumb to a cancer she believed was the byproduct of a stressful, toxic work environment. As a result, Vince vowed to teach business leaders how to build successful organizations by increasing the accountability of their leaders. He’s a leadership adviser, speaker and an author of The Leadership Contract(Wiley), a New York Times and USA Today bestseller now in its third edition, and The Leadership Contract Field Guide, published in January 2018.

Items Mentioned in this Show:

Vince Molinaro Interview Transcript

Pete Mockaitis
Vince, thanks so much for joining us here on the How to Be Awesome At Your Job podcast.

Vince Molinaro
Thanks so much, Pete. It’s a pleasure to be here. Thanks for inviting me.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh yes, I’m looking forward to getting into your wisdom here, but first I have to hear the back story of you playing at the accordion as a child. Why this instrument?

Vince Molinaro
I didn’t have much choice. I wanted to play the guitar and the drums but that got kind of ruled out. My parents were Italian immigrants, so the accordion is what most kids like me learned early on in their lives. That’s what I started with. Lasted about seven years of lessons every Saturday morning. That’s part of who I am. It’s part of my heritage as well.

Pete Mockaitis
The accordion, the first thing that comes to mind when I imagine an accordion is Steve Urkel. I believe he also was an accordion maestro. Was he not?

Vince Molinaro
I believe he was. I believe he was. It had at that time, certainly when I was growing up, a little bit of that geeky brand. Now actually I find that certainly among some Millennials, it’s a pretty hip instrument to play.

Pete Mockaitis
Excellent. You sound super hip in terms of your content that you’re sharing. I’ll give it to you. Tell me, did you have any tremendous accordion performances or highlights of your accordion career?

Vince Molinaro
You know what? My problem was that I very quickly learned to play by ear. I would listen to music and I could kind of figure out how to play it on the accordion. Instead of practicing all the music that I was told to learn, I would spend all my time at the time figuring out how to play The Eagles and Supertramp on the accordion.

That took over my interest. I was a pretty mediocre accordion player. There aren’t many memorable experiences as a performer.

Pete Mockaitis
I’m wondering, do you think you’d be capable of playing the accordion today or is it long gone?

Vince Molinaro
I could play at a very rudimentary level. I did when my kids were younger and they were – we gave them piano lessons. I did take some piano lessons. There is that musicality inside me that I still maintain a little bit.

I think if anything the benefit is it really introduced early on a love of music, a good ear for music and the discipline that it takes to practice something every day consistently though I didn’t practice what I was supposed to practice, I did spend a little bit of time on that instrument every day.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s great. I also want to hear about you’ve got a great title, the global managing director of leadership transformation for Lee Hecht Harrison. Can you tell us what is that role and this organization?

Vince Molinaro
The organization is a part of The Adecco Group, which is a global Fortune 500 company. LHH is one of the world’s leading talent and career development firms. We operate in 65 countries. We’re the world’s largest provider of career transition and outplacement services.

When companies are needing to reduce staff, we’re able to come in and provide really valuable services that help people through the transition, help them kind of find new work, better jobs faster.

Then we also have our talent and leadership side where we work with companies helping them develop their leaders so they can be effective in dealing with all the change and transformation that’s happening in many sectors around the world.

I’ve got sort of a small consulting unit and we’re responsible for driving the thought leadership for the company and helping really senior leaders think about how they need to kind of help their leaders get to the next level so their companies can be successful.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s excellent. You put some of these concepts into your book, The Leadership Contract, which is now in the third edition. Is that right?

Vince Molinaro
That’s correct. It’s just come out in its third edition as well as a field guide companion book that allows the leader to kind of apply all of the ideas in their own leadership role.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, that’s great. What’s sort of the main idea or thesis behind The Leadership Contract?

Vince Molinaro
It really started – I spent my career in the whole leadership industry. I’ve done it through consulting with hundreds of organizations over the years. I’ve done a ton of research and writing as well as I’ve held a lot of senior level roles myself and built businesses and whatnot.

In the last little while, we kept hearing a real problem by a lot of our customers, which was we’re investing more than ever in leadership development, but we’re not seeing it translate into stronger leadership. We’re trying to understand what’s kind of behind that.

I spent a lot of time reflecting on the industry, what I saw my clients doing. It came down to this idea of I think what’s missing is leaders not understanding that when they take on a leadership role, they’ve actually signed up for something quite important. But a lot of times that is not made clear or transparent.

It’s largely because we have a history of kind of promoting strong technical performers into leadership roles. We throw them into those roles, don’t give them a lot of support, don’t give them a lot of guidance of understanding what it means to be a leader. They try their best, but they’re never really performing as effectively as they can.

That’s where this idea of a contract in that I believe it’s kind of human nature for us to hold anybody we deem to be a leader to a higher standard of behavior. We expect more from people in leadership roles than I think we should. To me that implies a contract. When you take on a leadership role at any level in your career, you’ve actually signed up for something important.

I think that idea is not necessarily new. I think it’s always been there, but today the role is so demanding that we have to understand there’s a leadership contract and then the terms that go along with that contract. That’s essentially the big idea of the book.

Pete Mockaitis
Intriguing. What are some of the key terms of the contract?

As you talked about contracts I’m thinking – I recently became a landlord. We’ve got leases. It’s so funny with tenants. You discover maybe every few months, there’s another thing to put in the lease. We didn’t think of it last time. Not to put that in the sink. I guess we’ve got to spell that out. What are some of the key terms that show up in this contract?

Vince Molinaro
Well, there’s really four when I try to really distill it down to how to help individuals in leadership roles really think about their role. It’s really about the mindset of the leader.

The first term is that it’s a decision. You have to make it. What that means is you’ve got to really think about yourself and define yourself as a leader.

I have found in my work and my team has as well in developing thousands and thousands of leaders worldwide that you find that I can kind of take on a leadership role. Let’s say I’m an engineer and I’m a great engineer. They kind of have a split mind. They still think of themselves as engineers and the leadership part of their job like their part time job.

They kind of all get to that leadership stuff Tuesday afternoon where I’ve got a window between 2 and 2:30. What I’m saying is, “No, no, the decision is you’ve got to define yourself as a leader.” Yeah, you might be an engineer or an analyst or an accountant by training, there’s nothing wrong with that. But once you’re in a leadership role, that’s got to be your main thing. You’ve got to define yourself in that way.

If you know yourself well enough, you kind of say, “You know what? It’s not for me,” then that’s a very noble decision. I think we need more people to be honest with themselves in acknowledging when leadership isn’t their thing. That’s the first one.

The second one says that okay, once you decide then you’ve got to understand that it comes with responsibility and obligation. You have an obligation to shareholders, your customers, your employees, the communities in which you do business. The fundamental obligation is to leave your company in better shape than you found it.

You look around the world today. You see leaders involved in scandals or corruption or other bad behavior and you kind of go, “Well, they’ve clearly missed this point somewhere along their career as a leader.” Obligation is the second one.

The third one that often surprises leaders is I’d say leadership really is hard work. You’ve got to get tough. You’ve got to have the resilience and resolve to tackle some of the challenging things you’re going to face.

A lot of it always has to do around people, managing poor performers, giving candid feedback, making tough calls that might make you unpopular with your team but are critically important for your business.

Sometimes people come in with a fallacy of, “Well, now I’m the manager. I can just kind of put my feet up on my desk and everyone else does the work.” It’s like, no, no, no, you’ve got a lot of work to do as a leader and some of it is pretty tough. If you don’t do it, you actually – and if you avoid it, you don’t appreciate how much you weaken yourself and weaken your team.

Then the last one is really the new motto of leadership that’s emerging in companies is that leadership as a community. It’s about leaders working together in a very unified way, where in the past it was a very centralized, key decision makers at the top. They dispensed the order. The rest of us did our jobs.

Today we’re working in more networked models. It’s cross-functional work. We’ve got global matrix structures. You’ve really got to be thinking about all the leaders and the relationships they have with one another and how effective they are at working together.

There’s a leadership contract and the four terms that I think are really helpful to think about our role as leaders today.

Pete Mockaitis
Yes, I’m right with you there. I want to sort of talk through each of these a little bit. With the first point in terms of deciding that you’re a leader. I guess as a youth I went to many leadership conferences. It was sort of beat into my head that everyone is a leader. We’re all leaders.

Maybe could you contrast that a little bit in terms of the difference between we all exercise to a degree leadership and influence and self-management, and all that stuff, versus what you mean by the decision to be primarily a leader.

Vince Molinaro
Yeah, I kind of probably would phrase that a little differently. I would say we all have the potential, leadership potential within us. Then I think you’ve got to make the decision to fully commit to say I’m going to be truly accountable and work really hard to be as great a leader as I possibly can.

I don’t subscribe to the sense of there’s a few of us that have been blessed with these special traits of a leadership and the rest of us don’t have them.

Like you, I do believe everyone has the potential to be a leader, but I think that potential has to be honed and in order for it to be honed, you’ve got to be pretty deliberate at the decision you’re making and make that really firm commitment to yourself to be really deliberate as a leader. That’s kind of my perspective on that one.

Pete Mockaitis
Could you paint a picture for us with regard to the cost or the commitment or the time investment that is really necessary to lead effectively.

Vince Molinaro
I’m not sure if it’s as much about a time commitment as much as really how you think about yourself. If you think about yourself as a leader, then you realize that in many ways there are different expectations of you, to know that you’re always on.

A good example is someone I write about the story in the book. He was a team member, this was in a technology company, … team. Then he got promoted to be the leader of the team.

Now all of the sudden, he found that the nature of his relationships changed, that he couldn’t behave in the way he did when he was a team member, where they would go out for dinner and for drinks and party and have fun. He realized, “No, no, now I’m the leader. I need to behave differently.”

It doesn’t mean that I bring a sense of authority to the relationship. The expectations are different. There was an example of how he realized he needed to step up in different ways in order to lead that team. He still had strong relationships. He just wasn’t one of the guys and the gals as much.

That’s sort of that it’s kind of more how you show up, what you pay attention to, what you’re being deliberate about and obviously that commitment to develop yourself, to be open to feedback and to invest in your own development. I think those become fundamental.

Pete Mockaitis
Understood there. When it comes to the leadership is hard work phase, could you share a couple of examples of the hard work that is often dodged and how to engage in it all the more effectively?

Vince Molinaro
Yeah, the two we hear a lot about is not being aggressive enough in managing a poor performer and not having the confidence to give candid feedback to someone on your team. If you take, let’s just focus on one of them.

If you take the classic story of the chronic poor performer. I’ve played this out wherever I’ve traveled globally. It tends to follow a same story or arc.

You’ve got a poor performer on a team. Everybody knows who the poor performer is. When employees and team members are off having lunch or a coffee, there’s a lot of gripping about the poor performer. “Why can’t she or why can’t he get his act together? We’re all having to kind of put in extra effort in order to cover that person,” and on and on and on.

As the weeks and months go by and you as the manager or the leader do nothing, the conversation shifts from the poor performer to who? To you. Now the gripping is about why aren’t you doing anything to help this person. Either give them training, either move them to another role or maybe they need to be exited from the company.

Finally you get the courage and you decide that maybe yeah, this person needs to leave the organization. You finally do it. The first thought that comes to your mind – into your head every time you do it is why did I wait so long.

That’s been a universal finding every single time I talk to a leader about this. It doesn’t matter whether they’re a CEO or a supervisor, a team lead. If we knew that, if we know why are we waiting so long, then why do we wait so long? We don’t appreciate there’s a price you pay as the weeks and months go by not addressing an issue like this.

That’s only one of many issues you’ve got to deal with. What I talk about in the book is the hard rule of leadership, but as leaders, when we avoid some of these legitimately challenging hard work, we don’t appreciate how we weaken ourselves, weaken our teams, and actually weaken out company.

But if you have the courage to address them in a more timely manner, you actually strengthen yourself, strengthen your team, and strengthen your company.

This one gets a lot of attention from leaders. They all kind of admit, “Yeah, I’ve got a bunch of relationships I’m avoiding,” I mean, “A couple of conversations that I’m avoiding. I’ve got some strained relationships that I’m not doing anything about because I just can’t get myself to approach that person.” We don’t appreciate day-to-day how it weakens us and weakens our performance.

Pete Mockaitis
To the answer to that then, you mentioned courage in terms of executing that. Any pro tips for pulling that off?

Vince Molinaro
Well, in the field guide I kind of talk about really learning how to have tough conversations. I call them tough conversations because number one they are legitimately tough. They’re tough on the person. They’re tough on you. We don’t necessarily like having those conversations, but we need to.

A lot of times people kind of confuse being tough with being rough, which is not at all what I subscribe to. You can be tough, you can hold someone accountable, you can kind of put their feet to the fire, without being abusive, demeaning, or a bully.

What I say is the place to begin is to think about how much you care about that person first. Because if you think about how much you care about that person, you realize then you have an obligation to give them the feedback. Maybe it’s something in their blind spot. They’re unaware of something they’re doing that’s undermining their performance.

I see so many times a person’s career gets curtailed because everybody knows a secret about them but no one’s ever had the courage to sit down and say, “Hey, you know how you do this? This is not working out.”

What I find is that the more you do this, the better you get at it, the more practice you have, the confidence increases and then people just know that you’re a person they can count on to give them the straight goods.

I find a lot of times in my work with CEOs one of the things they value is “You’re going to give me the straight goods. I’ve got no one around me that has the courage to tell me like it is. I need to know how it is.” That’s I think the real opportunity.

What our global research has found is one of the lowest areas in companies is peer-to-peer feedback. You’ve got leaders who are hesitant – so if you and I are peers in different departments or divisions and we’re not getting along, we kind of avoid each other, but we don’t have the courage to kind of sit down and hash these things out.

I think that’s going to be the future of leadership – otherwise we just waste a lot of time and things drag out longer than they need to. I think it just begins with having that confidence and courage and knowing how to have a tough conversation, but it begins with actually caring about the person and their wellbeing and their outcome, their final outcomes.

Pete Mockaitis
I hear you. Then on the flip side of that I think that there are a lot of leaders who claim they want to hear the real truth, but their actions and demeanor, words in response don’t really mirror or reflect what they claim to want. Do you have any pro tips on how you can actually be encouraging and receptive to the real stuff, the truth that may be unpleasant to hear?

Vince Molinaro
I think you’ve got to be active in soliciting it, number one.

Number two I think a lot of scenario leaders often fail to appreciate how much people just naturally will tell you what you think you want to hear as opposed to telling you what you need to hear. You’ve got to kind of call that out and say, “Okay, are you telling me what you think I need to hear or are you sugar coating this or are you only giving me the positive side to the story?”

Jim Collins in Good to Great really talked about our ability to accept the brutal facts. I think that’s where it begins. If you can kind of set the tone that it’s okay to accept – to talk about the brutal facts, to not kill the messenger, then you will see people come to you.

Now, on the flip side, when you are that person speaking truth to power or having to raise a contentious issue with a senior leader, what I’ve learned that helps is if you don’t come across as you’re whining or complaining or blaming, because that’s what tends to get the backs up.

If you come at it with a place of maturity, you’ve done your homework, you’ve got the data, you’re being factual, that show kind of how you care about the company, then that also helps the message be easier to take as well.

I think it’s kind of a dual thing there. The leader has to set the right tone, has to challenge people to not make sure they’re telling them what they want to hear, not punishing people for doing that. Then on the flip side we need to learn how to kind of deliver some of those tough messages in a way that they’re going to hear it without reacting to someone who’s whining and complaining.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. Thank you. In addition to delivering the tough messages, what are some of the best practices in terms of regular and daily communication to be inspiring and motivating and getting the best performance from people?

Vince Molinaro
It’s interesting. We did a global study on leadership accountability. We looked at – one of the things we found was that leadership accountability was a critical issue in over the 2,000 respondents we had globally. 72%, three out of the four companies, said it’s a critical issue, but there’s only a 31% satisfaction with the degree of accountability being demonstrated by leaders globally.

We found that pattern, it doesn’t matter whether we collected the data in North America, South America, Asia, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, it was the same pattern. It was quite stunning actually. I was not expecting that.

But one of the things we also found is that there was a difference, a connection between strong leadership accountability and company performance, where industry leading companies just surpassed the rest of the companies on a number of areas.

One in particular that was interesting is we asked the respondents, “Think about the leaders in your company that are truly accountable. What is it that they do differently every day?”

The first one is that they hold everyone to high standards of performance. They set the bar really high. I would say that’s one of the things you need to do.

Number two is they’re genuinely excited about the company and its future. To your point around the inspiration, that’s where inspiration comes from. If I show up as a leader and I’m dragging my heels every day, you can imagine what impact that has on the engagement me, of my team, and my employers. But if I’m truly and genuinely excited and enthused, that’s a huge motivator.

The third thing they do is they actually have the tough conversations, so people know exactly where you stand and there is that clarity. You may not like the conversation from time to time, but they always know you’re going to have their back and not withhold anything that could be getting in the way.

The fourth thing is they’re very good at communicating the strategy so that everyone has real clarity about what it is they need to do and how it contributes.

The last thing is that they’re always kind of looking to the future, anticipating trends.

The first four are really about how you communicate, how you inspire. Set high standards. Jeff Bezos Amazon just with most recent letters to his shareholders, talk a lot about how they set really, really high standards and how when you set high standards, they are inspiring to people because people want to excel, people want to do great.

To do that, you’ve got to set the bar high. That’s the starting point. Then you kind of show your enthusiasm. Then you bring strategic clarity. Then you have the courage to have the tough conversations when you need to. We can kind of define behaviorally what really accountable leadership looks like day-to-day and the impact it has on people.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, I guess I’d like to hear maybe a specific example or a case study where I could just get a crystal clear picture associated with “Ah, that leader is being very accountable,” versus “Ah, that leader is being very not accountable.”

Vince Molinaro
Well, you know if you think about what’s been happening in the world and you think about – I’ve traveled – in the last two years I’ve traveled to 60 cities around the world. It seems like wherever I was landing there was a significant leadership story unfolding, mostly on the political side.

On March of 2016 I land in São Paulo, Brazil. I happened to land on the day when millions of Brazilians are taking to the street to protest their corruption in government and corruption among senior executives. There I was that whole week there to talk about leadership. That’s all anyone wanted to talk about.

But you get to see the negative impact that has on people when the most senior leaders are not being held accountable.

You can kind of see it in corporate performance. The good examples, probably the example that is a good one right now is what Starbucks has done this week with the training. They shut down the store to provide that important training they needed to kind of get a core cultural issue.

That was a very strong message from the CEO to say, “We have a problem. We’re going to fix that problem. We’re going to address it in a pretty dramatic way.” What company does that? What company shuts down its doors to address an issue that need to be addressed?

That’s an example of that accountability. They didn’t deflect it. They didn’t deny it. They didn’t diminish that. They addressed it head on. That’s the kind of example to me that we need more of.

What you generally find is a lot of leaders as they take on new roles in companies, they come in and they always see a gap in accountability. That’s the biggest challenge that I find that they’re struggling to put in place is how do you kind of create that sense of accountability.

Then you see examples of companies that haven’t fared well where leaders get defensive. They make mistakes, but they won’t admit them. You can kind of go on and on and see those examples play out.

But that’s generally what it looks like whether it’s at the C-suite right down to a front line. It’s people not owning their role, not owning when they’ve made mistakes, not apologizing, and doing nothing to rectify the situation.

Pete Mockaitis
You say accountability. It’s really about the ownership in terms of this is my responsibility and I will do what is necessary to ensure that it is made right.

Vince Molinaro
Yeah. That sense of ownership is really important. A lot of my clients say, “We want to build an ‘own it’ culture. We want people to feel like, they feel like the company is theirs.” Because if you feel that, then you bring that sense of ownership every day. You bring that sense of urgency. You just are kind of operating at a higher level as a leader.

Pete Mockaitis
Mm-hm. Do you have any quick pointers in terms of just immediate do’s and don’ts in order to be more of this transformational, and inspiring, and accountable leader like tomorrow, “Do this and stop doing that?”

Vince Molinaro
Well, I think right off the bat is if we kind of think about applying the four terms that we talked about earlier.

The first thing is you need to do – I’ve got a weekly blog that I call the Gut Check for Leaders. It’s always framed in the form of a question to inspire reflection.

I would think about really sitting down and saying, “Have I really made the decision to kind of think of myself and define myself as a leader. Am I all in and fully committed in my role as a leader?” Because you can’t do anything until that foundational question is answered.

Sometimes we let ourselves slip into a state of mediocrity or we don’t pay attention to it or we get so consumed by the day-to-day workload and challenges that we don’t pause and reflect. I would take a few minutes to think about that.

Then I would say, “Okay, if I’m all in, then what am I really here to do? What’s the purpose of my role? What are my key obligations? Who am I obligated to? What’s the value that I’m trying to create for customers, for my employees, for shareholders? How am I leaving my company in better shape than I found it?” Those are two pretty big questions that I think are foundational.

The other opportunity related to hard work is what one thing that you know you’ve been avoiding, and we all have our list of those things that we’re avoiding, they’ll come top of mind pretty quickly. Make some advancement on improving that. Stop avoiding it. Stop delaying.

Find a way to make progress because if you make progress, even in a small way, you are making things better. You are advancing things. You’re not going to be stopped. You’re not going to be spinning your wheels. That I think is critical.

What is it that you’re avoiding? Is it feedback I need to give someone? Is it a tough conversation you need to have with a peer or colleague?

Then the last one around community is research that shows in organizations today, the amount of collaboration that we’re doing has increased like 67%. Now we are more dependent on others for our own success.

There was a time when say 20 years ago when organizations were more hierarchical. I could be fairly independent as long as me and my team did our job in our own little silo, we were okay. Now you’re so dependent on one another.

I would sit down and think, how strong are my relationships with the people that matter most to my success. Where are my relationships strong? Great, maintain them. Where are the relationships strained and how can I repair them?

Those are the four things. You’ve got to decide are you all in, be clear on what you’re obligated to, start being more deliberate and tackling the hard work and strengthen the relationships that you need to be successful.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. Thank you. Tell me, anything else you want to make sure to mention before we shift gears and hear about some of your favorite things?

Vince Molinaro
I think we covered everything. Probably the part that I would mention is I think it’s really important in today’s, in this period we’re in now with the disruption that’s happening in a lot of industries, with the advent of artificial intelligence, and the whole move of machine learning and robotics, it’s unclear what the future of work is really going to look like.

But I think what I’ve come to really know and understand for sure is that an organization desperately needs leaders and need leaders at all levels to really step up and be strong.

If you are that one person that maybe you’ve never thought of yourself in that way, but you feel you’ve got that potential in you and if you really want to start stepping up, you’ve got a huge opportunity to add tremendous value to your organization and to your success.

Leadership roles are difficult, but when you can build a great team, when you can drive strong, collective performance, I feel there’s nothing better and more rewarding in one’s career than that opportunity to be a leader. It’s a time when we need strong leadership and we need more people to step up and be accountable and help our companies be successful.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. Thank you. Now can you share with us a favorite quote, something you find inspiring?

Vince Molinaro
A favorite quote is my current favorite quote. I got it a couple of weeks ago from Tim Ferriss, I think it’s his Friday 5 Bullet email blast that comes out. It was a quote that he’s been mulling called the Hanlon’s Razor. It says something to the effect of ‘never kind of interpret malice, when stupidity is a much better explanation.’

Why I like that is I find many times in organizations, particularly in large, complex organizations, stuff doesn’t always work out. In fact, it feels like more things don’t work out than do work out.

I spend a lot of time talking to leaders who are really frustrated by things that don’t work out. They get really angry like, “Why can’t marketing get its act together,” or, “What the hell is going on with sales?” “Those folks in R&D don’t have a clue what’s going on.”

We kind of attribute malice, bad intention, where sometimes I think people are just overworked. They’re not always making the best decisions, maybe because they don’t have all the information. I find it’s an interesting way of reframing those things that cause a lot of stress and frustration. That quote is kind of resonating with me the last few weeks.

Pete Mockaitis
You know, it does me as well. I think about that in large part in relation to the media when it comes to stories just being incomplete or seeming like the word choice is full of bias in terms of “Well, we know how you feel about this issue,” is that I think that I think this journalist really just has too much on their plate in terms of budgets and workload and what’s going on.

I particularly think about when the story is about a document like a Supreme Court decision or papal encyclical, it’s sort of like none of you have just read the whole document, which seems like sort of the thing to do when you’re reporting a story on that and it’s all completely contained in one volume.

It’s like you could read all of that and then you can report on it and then you have the complete picture of what’s inside it. But it seems like they never do. I don’t think … work in the mix.

Vince Molinaro
Yeah. That kind of helps, right? It sort of helps because you could be sitting on what were they thinking. I think that is an important part of people’s realities today.

I think what it also means for leaders, and I’ve been thinking about this as well, is this ability to sort through what’s real and what’s hype because there’s just so much coming at us. I just want to be clear on what’s going on sometimes. It’s hard to do.

It’s hard work because there’s a lot of information, some of it conflicting, some of it biased. Then if you kind of assume there’s mal-intent, but then that just adds an emotional component ….

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, thank you. How about a favorite study or experiment or a bit of research?

Vince Molinaro
That’s a great one. I kind of stay on top of a lot of the science that’s going on. I don’t think anything specific that I would cite. I think what’s interesting is I am starting to see a pattern in some of the research in a number of areas where what we’ve long believed or long held to be true is being upended a little bit.

It’s early days in my conclusion, so I don’t want to be too definitive just yet, but I think it’s a kind of an interesting time where a lot of these things that we always took for granted are being changed. That I think creates new opportunities to think broadly about our future and what’s possible. That’s kind of how I would answer that right now.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. How about a favorite book?

Vince Molinaro
I’ve always had an interest in kind of Greek and Roman thinking and drama, so I’m all into the books on kind of the stoic way and how it plays out in leadership. There’s a lot of those books out now that are really meaningful to me.

That’s great in many ways. There’s a number of those. Ryan Holiday does some great work there. It just brings kind of an interesting perspective to life, which is in many ways really practical and in some ways also pessimistic, which I find interesting. It’s just a way of helping you reframe and be effective in a world where there’s so much complexity and change.

Pete Mockaitis
Thank you. How about a favorite tool?

Vince Molinaro
Well, I do the cooking in the house. I would say that the knives I use to prep and make meals, those are my favorite tools, particularly when they’re nice and sharp and you can do some great prepping. I would say those are my favorite tools because they help me cook the meals for my family.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. And a favorite habit?

Vince Molinaro
It would have to be the discipline of exercise and making sure I do that every day and keeping myself as fit as I can. I think that right now in terms of where I’m at is really important to me.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Is there a particular nugget you share that really seems to connect, resonate, get Kindle book highlighted, retweeted, heads nodding when you share it from the stage?

Vince Molinaro
The one I think I stumbled on is something about ‘when it comes to leadership, good intentions are not enough.’ I find that one always captures people’s imagination.

I think it’s because I think that we have a lot of people in leadership roles who are well intended but don’t appreciate what it really takes to excel and be successful, so good intentions are not enough when it comes to leadership. You really need to roll up your sleeves and commit to the role.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. If folks want to learn more or get in touch, where would you point them?

Vince Molinaro
Certainly, LinkedIn is the platform I primarily use to share my blogs and whatnot, so they can find me there. Or at www.TheLeadershipContract.com. They can find out about the books, the blog and other work that I do.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. Do you have a parting call to action or challenge to folks seeking to be awesome at their jobs?

Vince Molinaro
Well I think being awesome at one’s job really takes that sense of commitment. I think it’s echoing what I said before. Companies need people to step up and be leaders at all levels. Like we discussed earlier, we all have that potential inside of us. It’s not a magical quality that only a few people have been blessed with. I think if people really want to be awesome at work, the way to do it is to step up and lead.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Well, Vince, thanks so much for taking this time and sharing the wisdom. I wish you tons of luck and success with The Leadership Contract next edition and the field guide and all you’re up to.

Vince Molinaro
Thank you so much. I really do appreciate it and this was fun, some great questions. Thank you.

302: Curing the Under-Management Epidemic with Bruce Tulgan

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Bruce Tulgan says: "Delegation is not like putting your kid up for adoption. Delegation is like hiring a babysitter."

Bruce Tulgan makes the case for why it’s good to be the boss and the massive business costs of under-management. He also reveals the true definition of micromanagement and empowerment.

You’ll Learn:

  1. Why and how to avoid ‘managing on autopilot’
  2. The central importance of regular one-on-one meetings
  3. How to use the ‘Manager’s Landscape’ tool

About Bruce

Bruce Tulgan is internationally recognized as the leading expert on young people in the workplace and one of the leading experts on leadership and management. Bruce is a best-selling author, an adviser to business leaders all over the world, and a sought-after keynote speaker and management trainer.

Bruce has spent decades working with tens of thousands of leaders and managers in hundreds of organizations ranging from Aetna to Wal-Mart to the U.S. Army.

Bruce has received Toastmasters International’s most prestigious honor, the Golden Gavel. He’s written numerous books and his writing has also appeared in dozens of magazines and newspapers such as the Harvard Business Review, BusinessWeek, HR Magazine, the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and USA Today.

Items Mentioned in this Show:

Items mentioned in the show:

Bruce Tulgan Interview Transcript

Pete Mockaitis
Bruce, thanks so much for joining us here on the How To Be Awesome At Your Job podcast.

Bruce Tulgan
Thanks so much for including me.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, first I want to hear all about… You have a 6th degree black belt in Uechi-ryu, if I said that right.

Bruce Tulgan
Yup.

Pete Mockaitis
A karate style. And I’m so intrigued by this on a couple of dimensions. First of all, the degrees. More degrees is harder and takes longer, right?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah. I’ve been studying karate for 44 years, since I was 7 years old. And in our style 6th degree is a master. And so I had to go to Okinawa to be promoted to that level, but I’ve studied since I was a little boy. And in fact, my lifelong teacher since I was a young child – he now has come here to live with us. So, next door to my home is my office and my dojo, and my lifelong teacher lives with us now.

Pete Mockaitis
That is really cool, that’s really cool. And so, I’m intrigued then, with Uechi-ryu, is that distinctive from other karate styles, and in what way?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, all karate comes from Okinawa, which was the Ruykyu Kingdom and was annexed by Japan in 1879. And it’s kind of a nexus of Japanese and Chinese influence in Okinawa. But our style is a very hard style; it’s half hard, half soft, is what it comes from originally. And it’s based on conditioning the body and practicing kata, which are prearranged series of techniques, and fighting. And that’s true of all classical karate practice. So our style is a very effective style; it’s upright and it mixes the movements of the tiger, the dragon, and the crane. And it’s a lifelong passion of mine.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s cool, that’s cool. And so, is there any overlap between your interest in… I’m going to try to pronounce it the way you pronounced it – karate. Did I say that right? I always say “karate”. I feel so American.

Bruce Tulgan
American say “karate”. But “kara” means “empty” or “Chinese”; it means both things. And “te” means “hand”, and “do” means “way”. So “karate-do” means “the way of the Chinese hand” or “the way of the empty hand”.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, I’m with you. Well, so, is there some overlap there from that, I guess, mindset or way, and your company RainmakerThinking?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, karate influences everything in my life, because I’ve been doing it since I was 7 years old. So, it’s an art of the mind and the body and the spirit, and certainly it influences everything I do. I mean I’ve learned from karate that the fundamentals are the most important, no matter what you’re doing. The fundamentals are what it’s all about. I’ve learned that simple doesn’t necessarily mean easy, but simple is often what you need and simple can be pretty darn hard. And I’ve learned that practice, practice, practice is the way you get good at anything. And I think half hard, half soft, which is what our style comes from – those principles work in everything. It’s yin-yang. It’s also much of what we teach in our management seminars, is accountability and flexibility go hand-in-hand. So that’s kind of a nice analog to hard and soft – accountability and flexibility.

Pete Mockaitis
And so your company has done a number of interesting studies long term, over many years. Not quite as many years as you’ve been doing karate, but since the ‘90s, right?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, we started doing this research in 1993. I was a young, unhappy lawyer at the time, and I began interviewing young people, people my age, about their experiences in the workplace. And those first interviews turned into my first book, which was Managing Generation X, which finally came out in 1995. And we’ve been continuing the research ever since. So now more than a half a million people have participated in our longitudinal interviews, and from 400 different organizations. And tens of thousands of those interviews lasted 10 years or longer. So we’ve been tracking these issues – generational change in the workplace, human capital management, and leadership and management best practices – we’ve been tracking these issues since 1993.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, I’d love it if you could share sort of a key insight that has high applicability from some of these studies.

Bruce Tulgan
Well, our generational shift research is where we’re tracking generational change in the workplace. And of course demographers have been talking about this great generational shift that’s going to happen for a long time. Now it’s actually happening. The age bubble on one end of the spectrum is growing, as the Baby Boomers continue to age, every single day in North America alone 8,000 to 10,000 Baby Boomers turn 65, and they’re filling up the age bubble on one end of the spectrum.

On the other end of the spectrum, the fastest growing segment of the workforce is made up of those born 1990 and later. By 2020 those born 1990 and later will be 28% of the workforce, and by 2020 the Baby Boomers will be well under 20% of the workforce. So this has implications for staffing strategy, attraction, selection, onboarding, up to speed training, performance management, rewards, incentives, retention, knowledge transfer, succession planning, leadership development. All of these issues are affected by the shift in the demographics.

And of course it’s not just numbers that are changing, but also the mindset of the workforce is changing. Everyone’s talking about the Millennials, especially the second wave Millennials – the youngest, least experienced people in the workplace – those born 1990 and later, and what our research shows is that they are like the canaries in the coal mine. The young emerging workforce, they think short-term and transactional, they want to know, “What do you want from me today, tomorrow and this week? What do you have to offer me today, tomorrow and this week?” They do not want everything on a silver platter – that’s a lie, or a misunderstanding. They don’t want to be humored at work – that’s nonsense. They want to be taken seriously and they want to know, “What do I need to do every day to earn the rewards and flexibility that I need?” And so, I think that’s where we’re all headed. What we learned from our generational shift research is as the numbers shift, we’re all headed in that same direction. People of all ages… We’re all Millennials now.

Pete Mockaitis
Now, when you say “the canary in the coal mine”, I get that metaphor suggests a warning of danger and changes that need to be made. Can you expand upon that a little bit?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah. Any organization that’s still trying to recruit people by, “Hey, welcome to the family. Pay your dues, climb the ladder, and in the long run the system will take care of you.” So, “We expect you to make lots of short-term sacrifices in exchange for vague promises about long-term rewards that may or may not vest in the deep, distant future” – that’s from the workplace of the past. That doesn’t work anymore.

Pete Mockaitis
It’s so funny, as you describe that, I was immediately like, “No, no way, don’t believe you”, because downsizing, layoffs, it happens all the time. And I don’t know where it got baked into me, but I remember even in college I thought I cannot depend on any employer long-term for anything, therefore I’m going to assemble an unbeatable, indispensable set of skills that make me valuable anywhere and everywhere. And that’s one of the main reasons I chose to start a career in strategy consulting. And so, it seems like I’m not the only one who figured that out; this is pretty widespread, that these vague promises of future rewards ain’t cutting it for folks.

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, look. So that’s a big part of it, and I think that employers, they know on one level that job security is dead, that people have to take responsibility for their own success, but then they can’t figure out how to drive performance and retain the best people. A lot of organizations are having a hard time figuring that out, and the reason is because even though everything’s changing, they’re still operating on the same assumptions. So, organizations need to adapt. They need to realize that in a highly uncertain environment people are going to think short-term and transactional.

That doesn’t mean you can’t retain people for the long term, but it does mean you’re going to have to do that in a much more granular, high maintenance way. And so I think when people point to the youngest, least experienced people – the second wave Millennials – and talk about, “They’re so high maintenance”, I think that’s true. But I think people of all ages are becoming more high maintenance, because if you can’t trust the system to take care of you in the long term, you look to your immediate boss to take care of you in the short term, and that’s high maintenance.

And so it’s not that people are not willing to do a lot of grunt work very well, very fast, all day long. They just want to know, “Okay, how are you going to make the quid pro quo explicit every step of the way? How do I score enough points around here today, tomorrow, this week, this month, this year, to earn more of what I need and want to take care of myself and my family?”

And as you say, career security no longer lies in an organization chart, but it lies in the marketable skills you’re able to build up in yourself, your ability to add value, your ability to collect proof of your ability to add value, the relationships you build with decision-makers who know you can add value. That’s where career security lies nowadays, I think more and more. And we see this in greatest relief among the youngest people, because they’ve never known it any other way. So older, more experienced people maybe are having to adapt to this free agent mindset, but the youngest, least experienced people have never known it any other way.

Pete Mockaitis
You’ve got to be like Liam Neeson, with a particular set of skills.

Bruce Tulgan
[laugh] Exactly.

Pete Mockaitis
Whether you’re going to take down a bunch of kidnappers or have career security. So, I’m right with you there. And so, I got turned on to your work through Chris Deferio on the show earlier, and he was raving about your book It’s Okay to Be the Boss. And I too became quite intrigued as I dug into it a little bit. And so, could you share a little bit with us there, what’s the main idea behind this book and why do you think it’s really just connecting with folks and striking a chord here?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah. Well, that book, It’s Okay to Be the Boss, comes out of another line of our research – our research on leadership and management best practices, and the experiences that leaders and managers are having every day. And we’ve been tracking “under-management” is what we call it – it’s the opposite of micromanagement. We’ve been tracking what we call the “under-management epidemic” that so many leaders, managers and supervisors in the real world, they’re just not doing enough leading, managing and supervising.

And there are a lot of reasons for that, but when leaders are not highly engaged with their direct reports in today’s environment, things go wrong. And so the book It’s Okay to Be the Boss, what I tried to do was share the research we’ve been doing on under-management. What is under-management? What is the state of practice when it comes to most leaders and managers? What does it look like? What’s going right, what’s going wrong? And when leaders and managers are not leading and managing in a sufficiently engaged way, why is that? Why is it that leaders have such a hard time on the front lines, spending time in high-structure, high-substance dialogues, guiding, directing, supporting and coaching people? Why is it that managers have a hard time doing that? What’s going wrong? What are the costs? And then, what are the most effective managers doing differently? And that’s what the book is about.

It’s eight steps back to the fundamentals of leadership, it’s get in the habit of managing people every day; take it one person at a time; learn to talk like a teacher or a coach; make accountability a process, not a slogan; spell out expectations every step of the way; track performance every step of the way; solve small problems before they turn into big problems; and reward people extra when they go the extra mile.

That’s the basic thrust of the book, and I think it’s hitting a chord because I think a lot of leaders and managers feel like it’s getting harder and harder and harder to manage people, and they start looking out in the world of management experts and leadership books. And a lot of those leadership books and management books are telling them a lot of formulas that don’t really work. And my book has the virtue of, it’s not the flavor of the month; it’s just the old fashioned basics.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. So then let’s talk a little bit about this under-management crisis that’s there. So, can you paint a little bit of a picture in terms of what does that look, sound and feel like in practice, in terms of the state of management, leadership, supervision, and employees that is all too common and problematic right now?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, I think what most leaders and manager feel like they don’t have enough time to provide high structure, high substance, coaching-style guidance, direction, support every day. They feel like they don’t have enough time. And if you really talk with managers as we do every day, what they’ll tell you is, “Oh, I talk to my people every day”, but what that looks like almost always is they touch base: “How’s everything going? is everything on track? Any problems I should know about?”

And then the problem is those questions tell you nothing. And they interrupt each other all day long. So, when something pops into somebody’s head, they text their manager, they email their manager, they go look for their manager, they call the manager. When something pops into the manager’s head, they go look for the person or they text them or they email them or they call them. We call that “management by interruption”. The problem is nobody’s at their best when they’re interrupted. And then we see each other on email, we see each other in meetings.

And if you take those four elements – touching base, interrupting, email and meetings – that is what makes managers think they’re managing, because they’re spending a lot of time communicating. It’s just that it’s not very effective communication. It’s not time effective and it’s not effective in terms of getting into the details. So what happens is managers feel like they’re managing, and we call that “managing on autopilot” – touching base, interrupting, email, monitoring, and meetings.

And what happens is, problems hide below the radar, and then every so often a problem blows up and everyone jumps into firefighting mode. And then it’s roll up your sleeves, all hands on deck, and boy, is that time-consuming. It’s a whole lot harder to put out a fire and salvage the wreckage than it is to prevent a fire. So this is what we call the “vicious cycle of under-management” and it’s why so many leaders say, “Well, I’m already talking to my people”, but what they’re not doing is creating a structured dialogue where they spell out expectations, where they make sure people know exactly what’s expected of them, what are you doing, how are you doing it, what steps are you going to follow, show me your plan, they track performance in writing, and troubleshoot, problem-solve, resource-plan, hold people accountable, and provide recognition when people go the extra mile.

That’s what’s not happening in nine out of 10 management relationships. Nine out of 10 managers are not providing a regular structured dialogue, where they make expectations clear, track performance, problem-solve, troubleshoot, resource-plan, and hold people accountable and provide recognition and reward when people go the extra mile. Nine out of 10 management relationships that’s not happening, and that’s what we call “under-management”.

And there are eight business costs – problems occur that never had to occur, problems get out of control that could have been solved easily, resources are squandered, people go in the wrong direction for days, weeks or months without realizing it, low performers hide out and collect paychecks, mediocre performers mistake themselves for high performers, high performers get frustrated and think about leaving, and managers end up doing tasks, responsibilities and projects that should have been delegated to someone else, or sometimes were delegated to someone else; they just come back to the manager. So this is what under-management looks like.

Pete Mockaitis
Alright.

Bruce Tulgan
And it’s the elephant in the room in most workplaces. It’s a problem that hides in plain sight.

Pete Mockaitis
Yeah. Well, that is quite a picture, thank you. And it’s spooky, and it resonates, and it’s real. And so, well, I guess I’m wondering then, it sounds like you are asserting that if you spent some time upfront engaging in these structured dialogues and having less of the interruption stuff, you would in fact come out ahead, in terms of time turning into great output.

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, that’s exactly right. So, it’s not that managers don’t spend a lot of time managing already, they just don’t put their management time in the right place, and they don’t use it in a sufficiently effective way. So one way to think about it is think about all the time that people spend firefighting. Remember Smokey the Bear?

Pete Mockaitis
Yeah.

Bruce Tulgan
Smokey the Bear used to say, “It’s a whole lot easier to prevent a forest fire than it is to put one out.” And Smokey was one smart bear. And so in many ways, the discipline we teach is managing upfront in advance before anything goes right, wrong, or average. It’s fire prevention. Or if you like Stephen Covey, it’s quadrant to management, it’s putting leadership and management upfront, and making it easier for people to go in the right direction in the first place, so you don’t have to spend a whole bunch of time solving problems that never should have happened.

Pete Mockaitis
So the “important but not urgent” quadrant there.

Bruce Tulgan
Exactly. In many ways, good management is like taking a walk every day and eating your vegetables. It’s simple but it requires discipline and focus, and you’ve got to build those habits.

Pete Mockaitis
So, when you talk about having a structured dialogue, what does that look like in practice? What are some rituals, the equivalent of the taking the walks and eating the vegetables that should just be happening and be sort of like one-on-ones, schedule that recurring times, or how does that look like in practice?

Bruce Tulgan
Yes, so it’s team meetings, but only for what team meetings are good for. And then one-on-one is where all the action is. And the reason for structure… So, look, maybe it’s the same time – Tuesdays at 10:00, maybe it’s everyday at 10:00. Or maybe your schedule’s a moving target so you can’t do it at the same time every day or every week, so that at the end of each conversation, you schedule the next one. But the key is to have structure.

And the reason for structure is so that you, as a leader, know you’re going to have this conversation. And me, as an employee who relies on my leader, as your direct report, I know it’s going to happen too, so that I can prepare and you can prepare. The key to structure is instead of interrupting each other, we keep a running list because we know we’re going to have that meeting. Now, of course, we should be able to talk informally in between one-on-ones. And if the building’s on fire, then we better interrupt each other. But so often we interrupt each other – nobody’s at their best when they’re being interrupted – so often we interrupt each other when we really don’t need to, the building is not on fire.

And it works so much better if you keep a running list, and then before each one-on-one, you prepare. Some leaders and managers, what they do is they have their direct report send them a one-page document before the one-on-one, maybe the day before, with what are your burning issues, maybe status updates on ongoing tasks and responsibilities and projects, burning issues, resource needs, questions, and other matters. And then the key is by preparing, you’re going to make that dialogue so much more effective because you’re preparing. The structure leads to the substance.

And when it comes to the substance and structure, everybody’s different. The dialogue you need to have with one employee may be very different from the dialogue you need to have with another. That’s why one-on-one is where all the action is. Some people, you need to go over their to-do list with them every day. Some people, that would be ridiculous. Some people are self-starting high performers. The reason you meet with them is to make sure that you’re helping them clear obstacles out of their way, or get them the resources they need, or help them navigate interdependency, or maybe you’re trying to get ideas from them because they’re so good.

The conversation you develop with one person will be very different from the conversation you start developing with another person. And so the structure is key, but it might be every day for one person, every other day for another person, every other week for another person. And likewise, the substance will be different depending on what you need from that person, and depending on what that person needs from you.

Pete Mockaitis
I like that a lot, and as one who really doesn’t do well with interruptions. Not that I start screaming or anything, but it’s so true. It’s like, “Where was I?” All that time, reconnecting to what I was doing before the interruption, that really does add up. And so I’m curious then, there’s this time saving occurring with those eight business costs avoided. And so what kind of time investment are we talking about here in terms of daily, or weekly, or one hour, half an hour? What are the rough ranges that you’re seeing?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, it depends on how many direct reports you have. Look, the reality is there are some managers who have unwieldy spans of control. If you have 30 people reporting to you directly with no chain of command, best of luck. Now you’re still better off to have one-on-ones and maybe have a 20-minute one-on-one with each person. That means you could get to three in a day, and that means you get to 15 in a week, that means you could get to all 30 in two weeks. And that still would be better than the random unstructured loosey-goosey ad hoc touching base interrupting and firefighting that most managers are addicted to.

So, look, I say start with an hour a day. If you think you don’t have time to manage people, set aside an hour a day. If you really think you don’t have time, like, “No way,” then set aside 90 minutes a day, because it’s high leverage time. The less time you have, the more important it is to set aside time for guiding, directing, supporting and coaching upfront, in advance while you still have a chance to prevent problems from happening.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s good, that’s good. Alright, so then I’m intrigued by the title of your book itself, It’s Okay to Be the Boss. I think some would say, “But of course it’s okay to be the boss. Who thinks it’s not okay to be the boss?” What specifically are you challenging there?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, so many people, they don’t want to be in charge, or they feel like they don’t know how. A lot of people want the status, and the authority, and the prestige, and the rewards. They want the business card, but they don’t want the burdens of being in charge of other people. They don’t want the actual day-to-day work that comes from guiding, directing, and supporting and coaching people. So maybe they want the paycheck, maybe they want the business card, but in fact they resist the interpersonal difficulties that sometimes come with having authority over someone else.

If you have authority in relation to someone else’s career and livelihood, that’s powerful. And I’d say, do not take that power lightly. That is a lot of responsibility and it’s not to be taken lightly. On the other hand, you have to own your responsibility. You’re someone else’s boss. They go home at night after work, and sit at the dinner table and talk about their boss – they’re talking about you. So it’s okay to be the boss, but you’d better be good at it.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. And so I’d like to get your take then – in the realm of what you’re describing, being a little bit more hands-on and planful in these exchanges, what’s the right way to think about the empowerment versus micromanaging elements? It sounds like it’s quite easy to go too far in one direction or another. How do you think about navigating those waters?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, my view is that micromanagement is a big red herring. Micromanagement is the shield people use when they want to be left alone. “You’re micromanaging me.” “Nope, I’m just managing you. Good news we’re also going to pay you. If this were an amusement park, there’d be a line outside the door and somebody would be selling tickets.” And by the way, micromanagement is also the excuse a lot of managers use when they don’t want to do their job of managing. “Oh, I wouldn’t want to be a micromanager.”

But micromanagement is really quite rare. Real micromanagement is too much direction and feedback for this person with this task at this time. How are you going to know how much direction and feedback this person needs with this task at this time if you’re not in regular dialogue? So the way to calibrate is precisely to get in there and start talking about the work with this person until you are engaged in a regular ongoing structured dialogue with every person about his or her tasks, responsibilities and projects. Then how do you know how much direction and feedback this person needs?

And it’s a moving target. Maybe I’ve been doing X, Y and Z projects for a long time, so I know how to do those, I don’t need as much direction on that stuff. But what if I have a brand new responsibility? Well, then I’m going to need a lot more guidance and direction on the new responsibility for a while until I get up to speed on it.

So, I think there’s a lot of false empowerment thinking out there. The way to empower people is to leave them alone. What’s empowering about that? False empowerment is sink or swim, reinvent the wheel, figure it out, do it however you think it should be done, even though it’s probably not up to you. There’s nothing empowering about that. Real empowerment is about setting people up for success. Real empowerment is about making sure people know exactly what’s expected of them, giving them the resources they need, spelling it out, breaking it down so that people know exactly how to succeed.

That’s real empowerment. Real empowerment takes hard work on the part of the manager. And so what I tell leaders is, real empowerment is not so sexy. It’s the boring art of delegation, is real empowerment. It’s spelling out an area of responsibility for someone else, making clear all the guidelines and parameters, establishing good timelines, and following up at regular intervals. That’s how you properly delegate.

Some people think that delegation is giving away responsibility. Delegation is about giving away limited execution authority. So delegation is not like putting your kid up for adoption. Delegation is like hiring a babysitter.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. That’s a nice metaphor, thank you. I have a baby at home, our first, at the moment. So I’m right with you on that. And so then, I’m curious, you mentioned that we can do this. You can avoid folks kind of hiding out and collecting a paycheck, the stowaways. And so I’m imagining that this would be tremendously effective at surfacing very quickly, “Well, you’re really kind of not doing anything. I’m talking to you every week, and I’ve looked at what it is you’re working on and it ain’t much, and it hasn’t been much week after week. And I’m trying to ask you to do some extra things, you’re not doing those things.” I’m wondering that once you start engaging folks in this way, I think that many workplaces will surface many such people in that boat. Any pro tips for handling that once you’re in the thick of it?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, what I always tell managers is… When they ask me, “How long should I tolerate a low performer?”, what I always say to managers is, if you’re not providing regular high structure, high substance guidance, direction, support and coaching, then you don’t even know if you have a low performer working for you. Because if you think you have a low performer and you’re not managing, then the first question you should be asking is, “Is it you or is it me?” Because a lot of problems in the workplace can be avoided or solved relatively easily when managers start practicing the fundamentals.

But if you’re practicing the fundamentals of leadership, if you’re every day, every other day, once a week, spelling out expectations, following up, following up, following up, breaking it down, spelling it out, breaking it down some more – if you’re doing everything you can to set me up for success and to give me the support I need, and when you come back to me say, “Did you do it?” and every time it’s, “Nope, I didn’t do it.” “Well, okay, let’s talk twice a day.” You come back in four hours, “Did you do it?” “Nope.” “Okay, here’s a checklist for the checklist for the checklist.” You come back the next day, “Did you do it?” “Nope.” Well, how long does it take to figure out that I’m really not doing the job?

So managers often say to me, “Oh, the hardest thing is giving negative feedback. Oh, the hardest thing is letting somebody know when they haven’t done as good a job as they think they have.” Well, if you’re bending over backwards and jumping through hoops to help me succeed, all of a sudden, if I’m not doing it, I’m the one who’s uncomfortable, not you.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s true.

Bruce Tulgan
All of a sudden, when you come tell me, “Hey, you’re not doing it,” it’s not going to be a surprise to me. We’ve been having these conversations every day. It’s becoming increasingly clear to both of us that gee, I’m just not doing the job.

Pete Mockaitis
Alright. And then any choice words that you encourage managers to deliver under such circumstances?

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, that if you’ve been documenting this. As long as you’re documenting that you’re spelling out expectations and you come back, document that my performance is not meeting those expectations, then yeah, the choice words I recommend at that point are, “Hey, we’ve got a problem. And it’s not me, it’s you.” [laugh]

Pete Mockaitis
[laugh] I’m wondering if we should use the same intonation. [laugh]

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, it’s like when employees come to the manager and say, “Oh, you’re picking on me and you’re favoring Mr. Red.” And what most managers want to say is, “I’m so glad you noticed. The reason I favor Mr. Red is he comes in early, he stays late, he bends over backwards and jumps through hoops. He dots his i’s, he crosses his t’s. The reason I favor Red is he does more work than you.” And if you’re meeting with people and spelling out expectations and tracking performance in writing, it becomes much easier to be authentic and hold people accountable in a meaningful way.

Pete Mockaitis
I’m right with you there. And then I think you mentioned that this has so many implications for so many different parts of the organization, I’m thinking about just performance reviews. And we had a lawyer on the show previously – I believe it was Eliot Wagonheim – who mentioned that performance reviews in court cases for wrongful termination are never brought up by the employer saying, “As you can see, judge and / or jury, there’s a long history of underperformance.” But they are always brought up by the defense, like, “Time and time again, the performance reviews said, ‘Met expectations’.” And I think that is just a super clear, official, institutionalized way that you see this with regard to, is this management really happening on a meaningful basis, or is it not at all.

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, I think you’re absolutely right. We call that “false fairness”, “false nice guy syndrome”, and “avoidance of conflict”. And what happens is that if you’re not managing people every day, every other day, once a week, guiding, directing, supporting and coaching them, tracking performance in writing, then what happens is the review period comes up and everyone’s got to kind of figure it out. And often people are making reference to work that they’ve never seen directly, or they weren’t supervising directly, or something that was 10 months ago, or people think it’s politics or who you like.

And a lot of times what happens is because of all of these complications, managers do not give real granular feedback, but rather everyone gets a “Meets expectations”. And so it means the paper trail is not helpful, it’s not accurate, it’s not driving performance, and it’s a sledgehammer that has no real management impact. If anything, it has a negative impact.

So, one of the beauties of guiding, directing and supporting people on a more granular basis and providing more structured feedback on an ongoing basis is then when you do get to those performance reviews, it’s much easier to create them, it’s much easier to differentiate between high performers and low performers and people in the middle, and there are a lot fewer surprises. And it’s much easier to align rewards with performance.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s great. I’m thinking about, I’ve shared… I’ve looked at some people’s reviews before when they’ve opened up to me a little bit. And I guess I’ve had a privileged formative years in work with consulting, because I would see someone’s review and it was so sparse, it was like, “This is barely a page, and you get this annually?” Well, I got a four-page review, it’s single spaced, full of specific instances of my work every three months, at the end of every project in consulting.

And I actually looked forward to the review period because it was like, “Oh, I am learning stuff now. And this is enriching for me and part of value proposition of having taken this job.” And it’s just a shame how so often it’s just a joke. And it does, as you mentioned, cause problems in terms of, I guess, credibility, authority, trust – all that stuff being undermined because the words are often hollow in these documents.

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, I think that’s absolutely right. And by the way, high performers like to keep score, high performers like to get reviews, high performers want to be evaluated, because they know they’re going the extra mile all the time, they want to get recognition and reward for it. The only people who want to be managed by false empowerment and false fairness, the only people want to be left alone and treated like everyone else are low performers who are hiding out.

So, this sort of hands-off management and false fairness approach caters to low performers. High performers want a manager who knows who they are, knows what they’re doing, is in a position to help them do more better faster, get unnecessary problems out of their way, get rid of low performers who are in their way, and help them get recognition and rewards so they can earn more for themselves and their families.

Pete Mockaitis
Perfect. Bruce, tell me – anything else you really want to make sure to highlight before we shift gears and talk about a few of your favorite things?

Bruce Tulgan
[laugh] No, I think you’ve been very thorough.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh shucks, thank you. Put that in my review, Bruce.

Bruce Tulgan
Yeah, there you go.

Pete Mockaitis
Document it. Then can you start us off with a favorite quote, something that inspires you?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, gee, where shall I begin? I guess the title of one of my favorite books, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith, that’s one of my favorite quotes.

Pete Mockaitis
Absolutely. And how about a favorite study?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, we’re always doing research. So we’re releasing a new white paper in a couple of weeks called Winning the Talent Wars, so I guess that’s my current favorite study.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Any choice insights that you can speak to in a sense or two?

Bruce Tulgan
Yes, the supply and demand curve is totally out of whack. There’s much greater demand for skilled talent, especially in the STEM fields than there is supply, and that’s going to be true for the foreseeable future. And employers who don’t become more nimble in their employment practices and their management practices are going to find themselves engaged in frustrating bidding wars for talent. So you either are going to commit yourself to a bidding war, or you’re going to do the hard work of building a winning culture.

Pete Mockaitis
Well said, thank you. And how about a favorite book?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, gee, probably my favorite book of all time is The Last Lecture, and that’s just an amazing book. Siddhartha is one of my favorite books. Jonathan Livingston Seagull is one of my favorite books. There’s a few.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s good, thank you. And how about a favorite tool?

Bruce Tulgan
A favorite tool? Well, I guess in my own life, probably the tool I use the most are reading glasses and my iPhone. But I think in the management world, the tool that I recommend the most is what we call the “manager’s landscape”. And at the top of the page, you create a horizontal axis with six questions: Who, Why, What, How, Where, and When.

And then in the Who column, you list all of your direct reports and make a few notes about them – A player, B player, C player, that sort of thing. In the Why column, for each person you say, “Here’s why I’m managing this person. Here’s my goal with this person. Here’s what I’m trying to help this person get better at.” In the What column, you put what’s your message for this person right now, or what are your questions for this person right now. In the How column, it’s a trial-and-error thing, but it’s how do you talk to this person. Some people, you ask question; some people, you give orders; some people, it’s a combination of both. And then Where and When – where and when are you going to have these conversations, and how often of course? So that’s what we call the “manager’s landscape”. So that’s a very powerful tool that we recommend.

Pete Mockaitis
Very nice. And how about a favorite habit?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, I think fitness is at the core for me. Take a walk every day and eat your vegetables. But I think in general, human beings are creatures of habit. And the only question is, do you have good habits or bad habits? That’s where you have to make choices. Human beings are creatures of habit. Habits feel good. And the problem is that bad habits feel just as good as good habits. The good news is that if you take the time and discipline to develop good habits, they feel just as good as bad habits, and they make you stronger.

Pete Mockaitis
And tell me, is there a particular nugget, an articulation of your message that really seems to connect and resonate with folks?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, I guess, “The fundamentals are all you need.” “Own your responsibility, own your authority.” “It’s okay to be the boss, be good at it.”

Pete Mockaitis
And Bruce, if folks want to learn more or get in touch, where would you point them?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, our website is RainmakerThinking.com, and there’s a whole bunch of free resources at RainmakerThinking.com. Or you can always follow me on Twitter @BruceTulgan, or LinkedIn, or the normal channels.

Pete Mockaitis
And do you have a final challenge or a call to action you’d issue to folks seeking to be awesome at their jobs?

Bruce Tulgan
Well, the first person you have to manage every day is yourself. And that means you’ve got to be honest with yourself about your work habits, you’ve got to be honest with yourself about your personal habits, you’ve got to take care of yourself outside of work so that you bring your best to work. You’ve got to get good at being on time or a little bit early, take notes, use checklists, stay focused. The first person you have to manage every day is yourself, and then the second person you have to manage every day is everybody else.

Pete Mockaitis
Got it. Well, Bruce, thank you. This has been fun, it’s been eye-opening, it’s been intriguing. Please keep doing your good work. And just thanks for taking this time!

Bruce Tulgan
Likewise. Geez, I’m honored to be on your podcast, and thank you so much. Thanks for making it so easy.

259: How the Best Teams Operate with Adrian Gostick

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Adrian Gostick says: "Customer experience will never exceed the employee experience."

Adrian Gostick talks about what the best teams today are doing differently.

You’ll Learn:

  1. The differing forces that motivate each generation
  2. How to encourage your leaders to initiate regular career discussions
  3. The best ways to disagree without causing offense

About Adrian 

Adrian Gostick is a global workplace expert and thought leader in the fields of corporate culture, teamwork, and engagement. He is founder of the training company The Culture Works and author of the #1 New York Times, USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestsellers All In and The Carrot Principle. His books have been translated into 30 languages and have sold 1.5 million copies around the world.

Items Mentioned in this Show:

Adrian Gostick Interview Transcript

Pete Mockaitis
Adrian, thanks so much for joining us here on the How to be Awesome at Your Job podcast.

Adrian Gostick
Well, thanks Pete. Thanks for your interest in our work.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh, certainly. Well, I’m quite interested, and it seems like you are too, and you apply it in multiple contexts, when it comes to studying teams and great performance, as well as in the context of being a high school soccer coach. So, I’m curious what inspires you to volunteer this way and keep volunteering this way.

Adrian Gostick
Well, it’s something I’ve done for several years. I started when my son was the high school goalkeeper and I got involved, and it’s just great to see young people need that connection to team. It’s one thing we’ve noticed in our research too, is that especially Millennials, Gen Z coming up into the workplace, really sparked great teams. And unfortunately so many of us as managers, maybe we’re not as good at creating those great teams. So it’s kind of fun to try some of our philosophies out on the soccer pitch.

Pete Mockaitis
I’m intrigued. Any stories of sort of leadership, team management sparking goodness coming to life with the high schools?

Adrian Gostick
It’s funny – I think in life we learn more from our mistakes than we do anything positive that we do, unfortunately. And when I first started I was assisting the head coach, and I don’t think you realize the importance of these concepts of motivation. It was more about the Xs and the Os, and he was very good at that. But slowly over the years we’ve helped him understand that you’re going to get a lot more out of these young men when you begin to understand their drivers – what motivates each of them individually, and quit worrying so much about the Xs and Os and worry about each individual – what drives them, what motivates them. And now he’s got a team that for the first time ever was in the state finals last year. And he’s got a team of young men who walk through fire for him, but it didn’t come until he began worrying about the soft side of leading people.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, cool. So then, I understand as I’m flipping through here, that is much of the good stuff inside your upcoming book The Best Team Wins. Tell us what’s sort of the main idea within this book, and why it is important here and now.

Adrian Gostick
Chester Elton – my co-author – and I, we do a lot of work with large organizations – American Express is one of our clients, California Pizza Kitchen. We’ve got some really fun clients that many people have heard of over the years. But what we try and do as we work with the CEOs and the leaders of these teams, is to realize sort of what their worries are. So, for example about five years ago we were hearing a lot on culture, and we were lucky enough to become one of the first to write a big book on culture and how you build a great culture. It was called All In, with Simon & Schuster.
And then over the last few years we’ve been hearing so much about teams. I know we’ve heard about teams for a long time, but things are changing, and there are challenges facing teams today – working cross-functionally, with Millennials coming into the workplace, with the increased speed of change – that a lot of the CEOs and senior leaders we were working were saying, “Really, teamwork has changed so much in the last few years, there’s really no guide to help me and help our organization understand how to navigate the waters of teamwork today.” And so, that really was the impetus to write The Best Team Wins, was how do we face the challenges of leading a team in 2018?

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Well, let’s go into it then. So you’ve actually laid out five disciplines of team leaders. Could you maybe orient us a little bit with a preview to start and hear what are those disciplines?

Adrian Gostick
Now again, we’ve got about 850,000 people in our database that we’re looking at, so we’ve got a plus or minus here at a fraction of a percentage that help us understand really what the best teams today are doing differently. Now, The Best Team Wins isn’t a Bible of everything that you ever need to do to build a team; there are still some really solid fundamentals out there but there’s been lots written on those.
So what this is about is what’s different about the best team leaders today, and as you mentioned, Pete, five disciplines emerged that we saw in the best teams, that they had the highest performance, the highest engagement levels. The first was that managers really did understand there were differences in the generations that they were managing, and they learned that they had to manage, say, Millennials different than Boomers, different than Gen X. So we talked about that, but it was very data-driven, and we’ll talk about that in a moment, I’m sure.
The second idea was that while we do worry about the generational differences, the best leaders are managing to the one, especially helping people drive their career development. That’s one of the biggest differentiators today, is helping me as an employee grow and learn and develop.
The third was that they’re much faster. Great team leaders really speed productivity – they get new people and teams up to speed a lot faster than their peers.
The fourth idea was that these great teams that we studied really were challenging everything. They had amazing debate within their organizations, and almost we call it “discord”, where they were really challenging each other and ideas.
And the final thing we found was that great teams had a focus on the customer that was laser. Now, there’s probably not a team in America or wherever you’re listening, who doesn’t believe that we’re customer-focused, but these teams truly were. Every decision, every debate revolved around what really would be the benefit to the customer. So, at a high-level those are the five disciplines we found in the research.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, yes, thank you for that preview there. And I would like to dig into each of these a touch. So, yeah, let’s talk first about these generational differences. And thank you for being data-driven – that’s what we love here. So, I’m a Millennial, I guess just barely, although most Millennials don’t like to be called Millennials. And that median listener – their age, according to my last survey… Maybe I need to get 850,000 data points, that’s awesome – is also in the Millennial age zone. So tell us – what are the “for real” differences amongst generations, versus sort of the “hype myth” differences between the generations?

Adrian Gostick
That’s a really good point, because a lot of people start tuning out once you start talking about entire generations. It’s a little like saying, “Everybody in Costa Rica does this” or, “Every left-hander is this way.” Of course, that’s just ridiculous. But what we can find in the data are there are some big changes happening in the workforce that we need to be aware of as leaders.
So for instance, autonomy has long been heralded as one of the biggest drivers of human behavior. Dan Pink wrote a book called Drive where he said autonomy was the most important factor driving engagement and motivation for people. Well, what we find is actually that’s true if you’re a Boomer, it’s true if you’re a Gen X, but it actually is not true for the vast majority of Millennials. Most Millennials coming into the workplace – 80% in our data – really want to be coached and managed, and part of a productive team.
They value teamwork a lot more than my generation – Gen X did. We much more valued the cowboy – being able to do things autonomously and independently. Well, this is a new generation. It really does value working in a team, they found that they’re more productive that way, better things are accomplished that way. Well, that’s a big overall finding that as leaders we should at least be aware of, and it may change how we manage. Another thing that came out of the data…

Pete Mockaitis
If I could jump on that in a little bit more detail, please. That’s intriguing. So yes, I too have heard autonomy is the thing we all want. And so then, maybe I just want to get clear on definitions a bit. So, I think of autonomy as sort of the ability to do your work the way you want to and with the time horizon more or less that you want to, in the location that you want to. But how are you defining and viewing autonomy in your investigations?

Adrian Gostick
That’s a great question. And one of the things we’re finding is that of course, nobody likes to be micro-managed, do they? What we really think about with autonomy as we study this, is that if I am driven by autonomy, I typically prefer to be my own boss and I like to have a degree of freedom … I typically prefer working alone more than working in a team. I’m giving you the definitions in our survey of people. I typically feel I get more done when I work more independently.
Now, as I mentioned though, almost nobody likes to be micro-managed. What we’re looking at with autonomy are people who like to work more independently. What we look at though and what we’re finding is indeed, out of the 23 human motivators we found autonomy ranks 4th highest for Boomers, it ranks 22nd out of 23 for Millennials.
So that’s a huge data shift. Now that’s something we need to look at that says whether it’s because of where I am in my career, or because of the generation that I grew up in, where teams were more important – something is happening here, where people prefer now to work more collaboratively. And so as a manager, whether I’m managing Millennials or anybody coming into the workforce, I’ve got to find ways to help people work together more effectively, if that’s making some sense.

Pete Mockaitis
I hear you, yes. And so, I suppose there is a natural tension. I guess as I’m thinking about myself, it’s like I want my autonomy, but I also want to collaborate. But in a given hour of work, it’s somewhat binary, in the sense that, of course none of us like to be micro-managed or be in crazy, pointless, time-wasting meetings. But I think you’re right – it’s like you’re either doing your thing your way or you are having a back-and-forth and doing something in, I don’t know, kind of like a compromise, or a jointly agreed-upon way, as opposed to any way you care to roll.

Adrian Gostick
Exactly. And by the way, nobody of course is one-dimensional, just as you say. Actually autonomy is one of my strongest drivers. As a Gen Xer, that is really one of my strongest drivers. I love to work more independently, but other times… Yesterday I went down to work with our little 12-person team, and it was invigorating and it was wonderful. And today I’m working alone in my office. You’re right – we’re all a mixed bag, but again, we’re talking about trends right now and what we can do with them.
One of the other trends we found, which was fascinating, is that Millennial-age people, especially those in their 20s right now, are about three times more likely to be driven by external drivers like recognition than older workers. And yet, where do most organizations spend their time recognizing people? It’s people who’ve typically been there a little longer, who achieve big things for the organization. Where, who needs the recognition? People who are newer in the organization, those who may be a little bit more even insecure about their role. Recognition helps them understand really what they’re accomplishing and how valued they are to the organization.

Pete Mockaitis
And so then, recognition here – we’re talking about kind of public. Is that fair to say? In terms of, “Hey everyone, we’re presenting the Rockstars of the Year awards. So come up on stage and we’ll clap for you as we say something cool you did this year that was meaningful for us.”

Adrian Gostick
Yeah. And really, when we look at recognition though – those are nice, but that’s once a year and maybe it’s once every five years. Those really don’t drive that individual performance. What we’re finding with recognition, especially with younger employees – that it’s it’s got to happen frequently, it’s got to be specific though. It can’t just be, “Boy, Pete, you sure do good work.” No, no. It’s, “Pete, I listened to your podcast last week. Insightful questions…” You can see already, I know what you’re doing.

Pete Mockaitis
I’m motivated, Adrian. You’ve got me motivated.

Adrian Gostick
Yeah. So what we’re finding is recognition has to be much more frequent, specific and timely than it’s ever been, as we sort of think about managing a new generation.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. So that’s a top tip there for the Millennials. Anything that you would say in terms of a top driver for the other generations?

Adrian Gostick
Well, one of the things we find, and again this kind of leads us into our next idea of, while we’re being sort of generic here, what we do find is there are certain things that happen as we age. One is that we become a lot more interested in ideas like variety in our work. The worst thing you can do if you’ve got somebody who’s in their 50s working for you, the worst thing typically you can do is make their job rote – just the same thing day after day. We become much more interested in variety as we age, much more interested in ideas like developing others, leaving a legacy, creativity becomes actually even more important as we age, to challenge ourselves.
What we also found is that there are some things that are really quite similar though, in our DNA, no matter what age we are. We all want to make an impact. Or I shouldn’t say “all”, but really the vast majority of us have “impact” as a top driver. Another is learning. And what was fascinating to us is that it didn’t matter if somebody was in their 20s or 70s – learning typically fell as a top driver for the vast majority of people. So a couple of really interesting findings – we’re more similar than we may think, and there are also some interesting little differences we found.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s good. And so you were getting at, rather than going into broad groups of people, manage to the one, in terms of the particular drivers for an individual. And so, I’d love to get your take on, how do you elicit some of those drivers and then play to them effectively?

Adrian Gostick
Yeah, that’s a great question because I may be sounding like I’m talking out of both sides of my face, because I’m saying in one way you’ve got to understand generations, and that does help us understand from a mass perspective who’s working for us. But really the best leaders that we’ve studied over the last three or four years as we’ve been writing this book, really do get to know their individuals too.
And in the book we have a lot of ideas about how you figure out the specific drivers of your people, but this all leads to an idea we call “job sculpting”, where really you’re going to sit down with each of your people, and many of the great organizations we’ve been studying, they do this as often as monthly with their people, and they have career development discussions every single month with their people: “Where are you going? Are you having the right training, the right opportunities, the right challenges to get you where you want to go in your career, even if you may leave us one day?”
What we’re finding is organizations that worry about their people’s careers are cutting turnover dramatically, and they’re increasing engagement levels. And this is something that’s well within the control of every manager. I might not be able to give you a huge raise at the end of the year, I certainly can’t impact probably your bonus structure too much, or your benefits, but what I can do is meet with you and talk about your career and how I can help you with that, as a manager.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. So the sculpting then is kind of like, “Okay, now that I know that you’re interested in analytics, I’m going to be on the lookout for some analyticky pieces of work that are coming up and try to get that flowing your way.” Is that what you mean there?

Adrian Gostick
Exactly, yeah. And what we do is we give people the structure to be able to talk about this, because in many cases they really don’t know what gives them that skip in their step every day. And so we give them a series of questions they can go through, and then they can begin having these conversations with their managers that they can sculpt their jobs and say if it is analytics that drives you…
Unfortunately sometimes we as leaders sort of peg people into, “Well, Pete – he’s the creative guy, so he always wants to be creative” or, “Susan – she’s the behind-the-scenes, detail person. I always give her those assignments.” Well, maybe Susan wants to work with some clients and challenge herself and push herself. So really, this is a two-way conversation, to be able to understand what drives our people, and also if there’s a chance, to be able to give them a few things that’ll motivate them. In many cases people will actually even work harder if you take the time to work with them in that way.

Pete Mockaitis
So then, I’d love to hear some of those excellent questions that help surface the stuff that people like and gets them going.

Adrian Gostick
Well, a few of the things we really challenge people to think about in this case, is, “What is it exactly that you’re doing on those days when the day really flies by? What are the activities that really you are undertaking?” And also, “What are the activities that frustrate your work, that on those days when you have to do them, you hit the Snooze button? What exactly is it about those activities that demotivate you?”
So we just start driving down. You’re using the Socratic method of saying, “Why?” “Why does that demotivate you? What is it about it that’s frustrating you?” So very simple questions that we’re pushing there. And what you do is you start near-term and then you move farther-term. So you start with the day-to-day – what’s motivating, what’s demotivating – and then you go bigger picture.
For example, “If you had three wishes for your career, what would they be?” Because then people typically are thinking a little further out – 5, 10 years. And then you can sort of talk about educational, skills, opportunities that’ll be needed, different things that’ll help you get to that point. And of course too, as a leader, you’re also helping temper expectations and say, “To get there, this is what you’re going to have to do” or, “You may not be ready to get there yet”, and just be able to have those honest conversations with people.

Pete Mockaitis
And what I think is so powerful about this is not only sort of the content that flows from it for job sculpting; it’s also the content that flows from it from an organizational perspective. It’s like, “Oh, we’ve got a process that’s just broken. You hate it because it really does not make any sense that we do this dumb thing.” Or, “Oh, in this certain area the decision-making roles are just wildly unclear. Well, no wonder that just sucks. So let’s see if we can clean that up.”
So I guess it helps them both in terms of the assignments they’re taking on, as well as cleaning up little messes all around, as well as just conveying that, “We care about you.” Because I don’t know, maybe you’ve got some data on this – how many organizations take the time to have these conversations? And I guess it can vary even leader by leader inside an organization, but if you had to give a rough guesstimate here, what proportion of leaders are having conversations like this on a regular basis, versus aren’t right now?

Adrian Gostick
Yeah, that’s a really good question. I don’t have the specific data; we just know what we’re showing is this is what the best leaders that we found were doing, those that had the highest engagement scores. But also, when we would go into an organization to study them, we would… For instance we went into Danaher, which is a 70,000-person technology company and we said, “Okay, give us your best manager.” And they would send us to XYZ person and we would interview that person.
So typically we’re getting the best of the best, and this is what we’re finding the best were doing. And they were having these sort of career discussions, these job sculpting discussions, as well as regular weekly updates with each of their people about what was happening in their jobs. So really, this is what the best of the best are doing. If I had to guess, probably 10% of managers, I would say, are probably really good at these types of things, but those 10% are blowing the doors off of performance.

Pete Mockaitis
And I guess now I’m wondering if someone’s listening and you’re in an organization like, “Dang, I wish my boss did that, and we just don’t.” Do you have any pro tips on trying to do a little bit of steering the change or starting the shift within, if you don’t have sort of a big power title authority from a positional perspective?

Adrian Gostick
Yeah, a couple of things you can do. The Best Team Wins really is a book for anybody who leads a team, but also anybody who aspires to or anybody who tries to influence others around them. And so there are lots of sort of hacks for all of us to help us become better at this. If you find yourself as a member of a team and maybe your manager isn’t as good at this as perhaps he or she should be, you can always hopefully set them up for success, to be able to give them a few of these ideas, to be able to say, for instance on this idea of job sculpting, “Hey, here’s what I read in this book. This is what some great leaders are doing.”

Pete Mockaitis
“Buy it!”

Adrian Gostick
Yeah, buy them a copy of the book. But that besides, “This is what some of the great leaders are doing. They’re having regular career discussions with their people. Doesn’t cost them anything. It’s a 15 to 30-minute conversation once a month and it helps them sculpt jobs, find out what’s frustrating them, helps them give direction. I’d love to do that with you. Is that something that you feel like you could commit to, just for a few months to see how it goes?” There are some simple things you can do to help your manager see the power in some of these very simple ideas.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, thank you. So, I want to hear maybe just a quick bit about speed productivity, because I want to go into some depth on healthy discord and challenging things. So, how does one get productivity flowing all the faster?

Adrian Gostick
Well, what we find is there are a couple of things here. One is that we have to help people understand this idea – it’s security, if you will – it’s overcoming the fear factor and understanding that, “Look, you now belong on this team. You may be a new employee, you may be brand new to our team, but here’s why you were invited, here’s why you are important, and here’s the role that you play.” Clarity is so huge in this process.
The second part – and I’m giving you very fast here – is context. It’s helping your new people understand not only where they fit in the team, but where the team fits into the entire organization. You think about it as you’re in the mall and there’s the red dot that says, “You are here.” Well, I know it sounds odd, but we are so poor in most organizations at helping people understand not only the big picture, but how the widget I’m making or the thing I’m selling or the customer I’m speaking with, really impacts the big picture, and giving me that context.
And the last one may sound really warm and fuzzy, but in great teams that speed productivity there’s a greater level of affiliation, which basically means friendships: “I feel like I’m accepted here, I’m valued as a human being.” We found one bank in our study – it was a call center – that simply had everybody go on break at the same time, versus the old system, where people would sporadically go when they could.
The entire team went on break for 15 minutes. It was a silly little thing, but they had to do a lot of work to send the phones elsewhere, but all of a sudden productivity soared, and people started looking out for each other. And why? Because they knew each other’s families, they started talking about things. All of a sudden they became a tighter team. So there’s lots of little things you can do to build these ideas of affiliation and context and security to help build a great team, and fast.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay, cool. And that notion of security, I think really does help enable folks who feel capable of engaging in some healthy discord and to do some challenges. And so, I think that you had a great turn of a phrase about “disagreeing without causing offense”. And boy, what a skill for our time and place right now, and I think that it’s huge. And so, I’m a believer and I’m so curious on your take on this. Any sort of data-driven insights, and particularly how do you get there, especially whether it’s sort of changing from within: “When people disagree with me, I feel offended.” I know you can’t change people exactly, but influencing others to adopt that same kind of a mindset, where they too can be challenged and not think, “Well, this person’s dead to me” or, “They’re an enemy of mine.”

Adrian Gostick
Yeah. It’s unfortunate, but how often do we… Probably most of us have worked at some place or other over the years where debate is just quashed, whether overtly or covertly. I had boss who stormed into my office once after I debated with him in one meeting and he told me, “You’ll never do that to me again.” Do you think anybody was giving their best ideas in an environment like that?
So really, what we found, and we do have quantitative data that says those environments that are more about the debate, are more innovative, etcetera… But this is more on the qualitative side, that when we went into these great organizations, we would ask them, “Okay, how do you create this discord without it turning into a … and it turning into, as you said, where feelings are hurt, etcetera?”
So typically they have some sort of ground rules – things like, “You challenge the position but never the person, you don’t make things personal.” And again, the ground rules come up and the leader of the debate may say, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, I think we’re crossing over the line there. You remember our rule is…” For instance, another one: “Seek to gather facts and don’t jump to conclusions.” Okay, so another rule we heard in another team. Another one was, “Remember, you’re in a competition to win. The best ideas win. You’re not here to ram home your points.”
And so, I could go on with the rules, but really that’s the “A-ha” from this, is that there are rules, and that there are some rules to make sure the debate is lively. All of us want to argue out things. You think of your last family event. Did you guys sit around and just make small talk or did you start debating politics and sports and all the things you’re passionate about? Of course, we do it in our personal lives. We want to debate in our work lives; we want to make things better, but there do have to be rules that help keep us positive and focused on the right things.

Pete Mockaitis
You said we could go on about the rules, and I really would. I’d love for you to go on about the rules. Could you share a couple more?

Adrian Gostick
Yeah. Another one is – and this is an interesting one – is that one other word we heard quite often was, “Look, after the team makes a decision collaboratively, we’re going to support it, even if it wasn’t our own idea.” Now that’s huge, because you may not agree with it after you leave. And it doesn’t mean we all have to be automatons and robots here walking around, but the point is if we are a team, we’re going to support the team.
And one of the things we heard, one great CEO that we interviewed for the book said typically 98% of the time he says, “My team as they’re debating, is able to come up with consensus.” He says, “I really don’t have to make a decision as a leader, because it’s so obvious by the time we get there.” And there are a couple of things he says you’ve got to do though. He says typically you may have somebody on the team who hasn’t spoken up, and you’ve got to make sure they’re really bought in, because they could leave and sort of undermine everything.
So he may say, “Cindy, you really haven’t said anything. I need to hear from you. What are you thinking? Do you feel like we’re on the right track or not?” And he says, “There are times where I do have to make a decision, I do have to say…” But he says you can still be very respectful about that as well. So for instance he may say, “Boy, this has been great debate on both sides of this issue. A reasonable person could go either way. I feel like we’ve got to make this decision and go this direction this time, but thank you so much for this excellent debate.”
Now, really simple, right? He says by doing that, next time people feel free to speak up, and when they leave the meeting they don’t feel like they’ve been quashed. They feel like their voice has been heard. So just some really simple little things we can do to create this environment, where we lead debate and we help steer it toward a great conclusion, where people are still respectful but the best ideas emerge.

Pete Mockaitis
Perfect, thank you. Well, Adrian, tell me – anything else you really want to make sure to mention before we shift gears and hear about some of your favorite things?

Adrian Gostick
One of the other things I guess I would say with this is – and it’s always fun to hear – is that now and then after we put out a book… And I think this will be the same way – our book’s coming out February 13th. So typically I get some emails afterwards about different things and how people are using this in their work situations. But what’s been really fun is that people will send me an email and they’ll say, “I’ve now tried this at home and it actually does work.”
Some of these different ideas about debating healthily, or the ideas about understanding what drives each person, or figuring out what our collective challenges are, what our purpose is within our families or our relationships. So it’s fun to see this work at work, but it’s really quite heartening to see these also work in our homes lives too, in our personal lives. So there’s just one little thought.

Pete Mockaitis
That is good, thank you. Cool. Well, now can you share with us a favorite quote, something you find inspiring?

Adrian Gostick
One of the things Maya Angelou once said was that people don’t care or they won’t remember what you say or they won’t remember what they do, but they’ll always remember how you make them feel. And really, what our whole career has been about is helping leaders and managers and people who want to become leaders of others succeed.
And one of the things that really we have to remember as a leader is that we don’t know where people have been their other 16 hours they’re not with you during their day, but the 8 hours they’re with you can be the best hours of their day. But really it’s a sacred charge; we’ve got to realize these people in our care are literally in our care. And how do we motivate them, how do we engage them, how do we challenge them to do more than they ever thought possible? That’s our charge.

Pete Mockaitis
Cool, thank you. And how about a favorite study or experiment or a bit of research?

Adrian Gostick
Let’s see. Well, we do so many research studies ourselves. One of the bits of data from The Best Team Wins actually is – and this really shocked us, but we found it over and over again – was that how much time people typically spend today in working collaboratively. Deloitte has found that 80% of an average employee’s day is spent working collaboratively. Now, that is definitely a change from even just a few years ago. We’re moving at light speed toward a world where we no longer work alone. We work with others, and we really have to figure out how we work best with each other, and in many cases change our thinking about this.

Pete Mockaitis
Thank you. And how about a favorite book?

Adrian Gostick
Let’s see. I just finished a terrific book called Beneath a Scarlet Sky, I believe it’s called. It’s about during the Second World War an Italian young man who helped Jews escape across the mountains, the Alps, during the Second World War. And it was one of the best reads that I’ve read in a long time.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh, thank you. And how about a favorite tool, something that helps you be awesome at your job?

Adrian Gostick
I travel a lot, so I’m always on the Weather Channel app, I’m always sort of surfing blogs. Really, it’d be hard to nail it down because I really do believe whether I’m reading The Wall Street Journal online or the Harvard Business Review blogs, that there are so many great ideas out there, and unfortunately so much of it can start sounding the same.
And what I really look for, and as a team, our little company is called The Culture Works – we’re firing things back and forth every day using Slack actually – one of the tools we use – and, “Hey, did you read this article?” Like yesterday there was an article from ESPN on the Patriots and sort of the dysfunction that’s going on right now via communication in their team.
And we started talking about what’s falling apart for a franchise that’s done so many amazing things for so many years. And we started talking about that idea – it’s communication, is Belichick having problem with generations, and this, that and the other. We just started bouncing ideas around; it was a really fascinating discussion. And so, I think that’s one of the things we have to do, is keep pushing ourselves and our teams to learn and to grow and to think about problems from different perspectives.

Pete Mockaitis
Excellent, thank you. And how about a favorite habit, something you do that helps you flourish at work?

Adrian Gostick
Well, one of the things, every day I’ll probably put in three or four hours of writing. Sometimes I’ll be out working with a client, but if I’m in my office probably half a day will be spent writing, but the other half will be spent reading. So, I think it’s so important, whether you’re reading a new business book or articles in journals or publications, or blogs, or listening to podcasts like yours – whatever we do; I think that one of the things I try to do is make sure I’m learning and growing and I’m not stagnating.

Pete Mockaitis
And is there a particular nugget or a piece that you tend to share with clients or audiences or readers that you find is often repeated back to you? An Adrian original that’s really resonating?

Adrian Gostick
One of the things we try to help people understand is, because everybody is so focused on the customer, and we let them know the customer experience will never exceed the employee experience, that you’ve got to start the service profit chain with your people, because if you care about them, they will care about what you want to care about. But they’ve got to know you care first.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. And Adrian, if folks want to learn more or get in touch, where would you point them?

Adrian Gostick
TheCultureWorks.com. We’ve also got a website at CarrotGuys.com, so we’d love to connect with you. Send us a note, pick up the new book The Best Team Wins, and we would love to hear if it’s working for you and your organization.

Pete Mockaitis
Alright. And do you have a final challenge or call to action you’d issue to folks seeking to be awesome at their jobs?

Adrian Gostick
I think probably the most important thing is really every day you’ve got to be focused on… If you are a leader of people or you’re a leader of projects or teams, the little things really do make a big difference. And what we’re saying from all of this – I’ve thrown out lots of ideas and talked about a lot of stuff today – really, try one thing at a time, and don’t try to eat the elephant.
Is there one thing you can add tomorrow to your management style, your leadership style, the way that you are part of the team or operating the team, that may make you more effective, that may make you more valuable to your people and to those around you? Don’t try to do everything. In the back of our book we’ve got 101 ideas for real team leaders. Grab one of those and see if it makes your team better. That’s what I would recommend, is don’t try to do everything. Just try one thing and see if it works.

Pete Mockaitis
Alright. Well, Adrian, thank you so much for taking this time and sharing these perspectives. I think this is so powerful and has the opportunity to be transformational in many ways for many work places. So, I wish you tons of luck with this book and all the things you’re up to!

Adrian Gostick
Hey, thanks, Pete, and thanks so much for your great questions. Appreciate it.

249: Leading When You’re Not in Charge with Clay Scroggins

By | Podcasts | 2 Comments

 

 

Clay Scroggins says: "We feel like we've got to be in charge in order to lead, and it's just not true."

Clay Scroggins discusses how to lead without being in the top position.

You’ll Learn:

  1. Three simple questions to help you collaborate better
  2. The equation for powerful leadership
  3. How to have difficult conversations with your boss

About Clay 

Clay Scroggins is the lead pastor of North Point Community Church, providing visionary and directional leadership for all the local church staff and congregation. Clay understands firsthand how to manage the tension of leading when you’re not in charge. Clay holds a degree in industrial engineering from Georgia Tech, as well as a master’s degree and doctorate from Dallas Theological Seminary. Clay and his wife Jenny live in Forsyth County, Georgia, with their four children.

Items Mentioned in this Show:

Clay Scroggins Interview Transcript

Pete Mockaitis
Clay, thanks so much for joining us here on the How To Be Awesome At Your Job podcast.

Clay Scroggins
Oh, Pete, I am excited and honored to be a part of this. I have listened to a few episodes and I’m a big fan, so thank you.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh, cool. Thank you. Well, I’m so glad to have you. I think we’re really going to enjoy this chat because one episode we had before, Dodie, Gomer, talked about leading without authority. It was a hit. And you had a whole book on this subject so I think we’ll have some fun digging into it. But, first, I want to hear, we had to reschedule you because you had a new baby to welcome into the family. How is that going?

Clay Scroggins
Oh, my goodness. I should’ve asked you earlier. Do you have kids?

Pete Mockaitis
You know, we are expecting our first in a couple of weeks.

Clay Scroggins
No kidding.

Pete Mockaitis
Yeah, or maybe he’ll already be here by the time this airs. We’ll see. It’s any day now, yeah.

Clay Scroggins
Well, it is our fifth, and so I don’t know. How is it going? I know the drill and it is, I’ll be honest with you, I love kids. I don’t really like infants.

Pete Mockaitis
Speaking about men, in general, because they don’t do anything.

Clay Scroggins
That does feel like, I don’t know, more of a guy thing to say, but I’m not against infants. Yeah, kind of like, like you said, they don’t do a lot. And then they’re just kind of you just kind of get through the first three months, so I’m trying not do that. I’m trying to be present and enjoy the little moments. And the great news is he’s healthy and everything is great, I mean, that’s a huge deal. And birth really is like this crazy amazing miracle to get to experience.

Pete Mockaitis
Yeah. Yeah. What is the name of your newest addition?

Clay Scroggins
His name is Whit.

Pete Mockaitis
Wit? Nice. How do we spell Wit?

Clay Scroggins
Whit Aries Scroggins, and at some point I’ll stop enunciating Whit so strongly but for now like it’s appropriate.

Pete Mockaitis
Is it W-I-T?

Clay Scroggins
W-H-I-T.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Oh, yeah, like Whitman or Whitney, okay.

Clay Scroggins
Or Whitney, yeah.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. I got you.

Clay Scroggins
Or Whitney, yeah.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, and you said your name is a little bit fun. So, tell us, what is Clay short for? And what’s the origin of this?

Clay Scroggins
Yeah, I’m Robert Clayton Scroggins, Jr. and, yeah, my parents grabbed the middle name and they call me Clay. My wife is so funny because when we had our first child, Regus, the first child was a girl, second child boy. I said, “Okay, we’re going to go Robert Clayton Scroggins, III,” and she was like, “I’m carrying this child for nine months. I really would like to have a say in the name of this child,” which I loved, and so we don’t have a third.

But, anyway, yeah, she’s also a big fan of naming the child what you’re going to call the child. And so, it does create some complications but it helps me. Whenever someone calls me, and they say, “Hey, is Robert there,” I realize, “Oh, this is a person that doesn’t know me.” So, it helps me screen the call.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, I had read that somewhere online that it was short for Claytonius.

Clay Scroggins
Oh, my gosh. So, I had this guy write some copy for this website I did. He’s a good friend of mine, he’s very funny, and he did make that joke. Or, in college, I’m a big OutKast fan there in Atlanta, rap, going to college in Atlanta. They had an album.

Pete Mockaitis
Alright Alright Alright.

Clay Scroggins
That’s right. Alright Alright Alright Alright. They had an album that were released called Stankonia and they called me Claytonia in college quite a bit, but, no, it’s just short for Clayton.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Well, I thought you’d say, “Yes, it’s short for Claytonius,” so, yeah, I thought it was going to go into an interesting Roman emperor sort of vibe. It’s just a gag.

Clay Scroggins
Like, I’ve never been asked that. I wonder what it means by that, but, yeah, it does say Claytonius or something. I don’t know. That was a joke.

Pete Mockaitis
Claytonius Maximus Claudius Brusus, you know.

Clay Scroggins
That’s right. That’s right.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. So, now we know. Now that’s settled, to set the record straight once and for all. So, I want to chat about your book How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge. But maybe, first, we could get sort of the quicker version of your backstory. You know a thing or two about leading when you’re not in charge. So, could you give us a quick overview of that tale?

Clay Scroggins
Sure. I moved to Atlanta in 1998. I grew up in Alabama – Tuscaloosa, Alabama, home of the University of Alabama, they play a lot of football there, and I went to Georgia Tech in Atlanta to major in industrial engineering. I studied engineering there. It’s a great engineering school and it made me realize very quickly that I am not cut out to be an engineer, but I stuck with it, finished school.

While I was in Atlanta, I got connected to this church called North Point Community Church which is in kind of the northern suburbs of Atlanta, and I volunteered there while I was in college. I was kind of a mentor to high school students, and just found a lot of purpose in that, really enjoyed it. It was really a great way for me to try to give back and try to help some people in a way that I felt like I had been helped in my life.

And so, anyway, I graduated from school with this engineering degree, and committed to never use it because I really felt like I wanted to find, I don’t know, purpose is a big deal to me. I really want to be able to find what I do to have a lot of meaning. Anyway, so I went to seminary to get a Masters in Theology, and ended up becoming a pastor at this same church in Atlanta called North Point Community Church.

So, now I lead, we’re a multisite church, so we have six campuses or six churches in the Atlanta area, and I lead our original campus in Alpharetta, Georgia. And, yeah, that’s what I do. It’s a pretty young vibrant church, it’s fairly large. On a Sunday we’ll have, I don’t know, anywhere from 10,000 to 12,000 people here, and I manage our staff here that’s about 110 people. But, in a way, I kind of lead a franchise, like a local franchise.

Pete Mockaitis
Can I have fries with that?

Clay Scroggins
That’s right. I do the burgers not the fries. And I have loads of bosses. So, yes, I do manage a good amount but I still have, I don’t know, there’s probably four or five people technically that are my bosses. But the whole process of, I don’t know, the kind of franchise multisite, you’ve got a central headquarters, and you’ve got these churches that are out trying to kind of do similar things, that’s really where I bumped into these principles of influence and authority is through my own professional story.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Cool. Understood. Thank you. So, then, well, could you unpack a little bit of sort of the key sort of theme or principles or messages inside your book there in terms of how does one go about leading from a spot of influence as opposed to authority like, “I am the boss who is in charge because of my title or position”?

Clay Scroggins
Yeah, I think what happened to me was I got a few promotions. The first job right out of graduate school, for me, was to manage one of our high school ministries at one of our campuses. And, I don’t know, I had dreams, I had aspirations, I had things I wanted to do, I had ideas, and then you quickly kind of get, I don’t know, you feel a little stuck, you feel a little frustrated, and kind of the reality of the way the working world works where you realize, “Oh, I can’t do all that I want to do because I don’t have enough authority. If only I had my boss’ job, if only I had all of the authority that my boss has.”

So I kind of started bumping into that, then I got a promotion and started managing more and, in a sense, I had a bigger job but still had the same feeling of, “Oh, no, I can’t do all that I want to do.” Then I became what we call the lead pastor of this one location and that’s when it really set it that, “Oh, my goodness, I’ve got a lot more authority than I ever have had but I still feel kind of hamstrung by what I don’t have,” and I think I was focusing on or feeling victim to the authority that I didn’t have at the time.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh, most interesting.

Clay Scroggins
And I started realizing and, honestly, I wrote this book thinking no one would read it. But the more I’ve gotten to be able to go into organizations and a lot of businesses and speak to teams and companies about this topic the more I realize this really, it does connect with people that a lot of people feel the same way. They feel like, “Yeah, I’m on the team and I sit in the meetings but, man, if I were in charge this is what I would do.” Or, “If I had more authority this is how I would handle it.”

And so, we end up, what happens is I found that I became passive and I would sit on my hands and I felt like I was waiting until someone put me in charge of more to be able to really step out and try to make a difference, try to bring some progress or some change. And so, honestly, it was through a few promotions that I bumped into this myth about leadership that we feel like we’ve got to be in charge in order to lead, and it’s just not true.

Pete Mockaitis
You know, that’s so interesting when you say, “It’s like I need more authority in order to do the thing that I want to do,” and then you got some more authority, it’s like, “Oh, wait a second.” And I think that there may be any number of resources, I guess you might call it, in the course of life and work in terms of, “If I only had more budget, if I only had sort of more personal income, if I only had more ‘free time’ then I’d really be able to do,” you know, whatever.

And so, it seems like it may be is sort of a theme or pattern in terms of similar lies or deceptions that we’re entertaining for ourselves. So, maybe, you could get at that sort of what do you think is at the root of the lie and why we buy into it in the first place?

Clay Scroggins
Yeah, you know, Jim Carrey is not necessarily the source for How To Be Awesome At Your Job, but here’s a Jim Carrey quote. I don’t know where he said it or when he said it, but he said, “I really hope that everyone could everything they ever wanted in life so they realize that it doesn’t meet all their needs or it doesn’t fulfill them.”

Pete Mockaitis
Okay.

Clay Scroggins
It’s a great statement and it’s kind of what you’re saying that maybe one of the most disappointing things in life is thinking you need more and then getting it, and then realizing that didn’t do it. and I would imagine there’s a lot of people listening today who feel that way about a promotion or about, to your point, “If only I had more income,” or, I’m single. I wish I was in a relationship,” or, “I’m in a relationship, I wish we could get married,” or, “We’re married, I wish we could have kids,” or, “We have kids, I wish they would leave the house.”

And then you get there and you go, “Huh, this wasn’t it.” So, I think part of what is in that for all of us is to try to figure out, “How can I not be a victim to my circumstances? But how can I use the circumstances I have to own the moment, and to say, ‘Hey, what do I have? What’s unique to the situation that I have?’” And there’s some power to bringing some ownership to the situation that you currently have and not be victim to it but instead try to leverage what you have to help make somebody else’s day better, to help make somebody else’s world better. So that may be is at the root of what I was experiencing.

Pete Mockaitis
Right. Yeah, and as you’re speaking I’ve got this lyric in my head, it’s from a song by The Avett Brothers, and the song is called Ill With Want, and the lyric goes, “I’m sick with wanting and it’s evil how it’s got me, and everyday is worse than the one before. The more I have the more I think I’m almost where I need to be, if only I could get a little more.”

Clay Scroggins
Wow.

Pete Mockaitis
And I think that song is powerful, and it’s a good tune. I mean, check it out. But I think it really plays into that notion, it’s like, “Oh, you know, I’m almost there. A little more authority would do it. Oh, well, maybe not quite. A little more.” And so, then you wake up, the Jim Carrey realization so, then, very cool. Thanks for sharing that.

Clay Scroggins
Real quick one about that. You know, one of the things I’ve loved about writing this book was getting to interview a number of leaders who have experienced being in a role where they’re not the senior point leader. One of the people that I talked to was a guy named Frank Blake, Frank from, I think like maybe, 2007-2014, he was the CEO of the Home Depot, an Atlanta-based company, it’s maybe, I don’t know, fourth or fifth largest retailer.

Frank is a fascinating individual because he has worked or a lot of great leaders. He worked for Jack Welch for a long time at GE and worked for both Bushes in different parts of the government. Worked at the Home Depot for Bob Nardelli, the CEO. But he’s always been in a kind of a second or third-chair position, he was never the senior leader until he became president of Home Depot, the CEO of the Home Depot.

And I asked him about this, I said, “So, Frank, I’m sure once you got in charge then you could finally lead like you wanted to lead.” And he kind of laughed, and he said, “No, that’s a very true point that even when you get to be the CEO you still don’t have all the authority that you feel like you need.” He said, “I remember the first week I was CEO of Home Depot, and I’d sent this memo out to everyone of our employees, saying, ‘Hey, from here on out this is something we’re going to do,’” and he said, “I walked down the hallway not 20, 30 minutes later and I see the memo in the trash can.”

And he said, “It made me realized, ‘Oh, there it is, authority alone doesn’t create great leadership.’” Which that’s one of the major tenets of this book, is that we all know leaders who have a lot of authority and they’re not leading well. And we know people who don’t have a lot of authority who are getting a lot done and are making a pretty significant difference in their world. And I would just rather be the one that is not using my lack of authority as an excuse. And so that’s what I hoped to help people with through this process.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Awesome. Cool. Well, let’s get into it. Let’s say, hey, here you are in the middle of a professional career, and you want to exercise some more leadership and getting some results, make some things happen, and you got to lean upon influence instead of authority. How do we make that happen? What are some key principles or action steps to do it?

Clay Scroggins
Sure. Well, I think the first thing anyone could do, I would imagine maybe if you’re listening to this and you’re running on a treadmill or driving then I wouldn’t write this down, please. But if you are at a place where you could, I think just jotting down the question, “How would someone cultivate influence?” I think that basic question is worth everyone of us answering.

And maybe even flipping the question of, “Hey, the people that I look to that have influence over me, what have they done that has cultivated influence in my life? Why do I want to listen to them? If they called me, and said, ‘Hey, here’s an idea,’ why would I be willing to try it? What makes me give them my ear when they talk?” I think that alone is really that’s where I started. It’s just saying, “Hey, if I’m not in charge, which I’m not, how do I begin to cultivate more influence with my boss, with the people around me, and the people that work even for me?

And so, what I did was I wrote down, “Here’s four things I want to do. Here’s four behaviors, I don’t care if anybody else does this, this is for me. I’m not trying to prescribe this. I’m no John Maxwell leadership guru. I’m just a guy. So, what can I do?” And that’s where I started. And then, for me, they really are behaviors that I’m trying to do.

The first one is to lead yourself well, and I know that seems, you know, there’s been so much written on self-leadership, so much content about self-leadership, but that really is where it begins, is to go, “You know what, we’re all so apt to blame our boss for how are boss is or isn’t leading us. And the truth is we have an opportunity, and maybe even a responsibility, to lead ourselves well. And the great news is if you lead yourself well you will ensure that you’re always well-led.”

And so, you can always start there, going, “Okay, what does it look like to lead me really well?” For me, self-leadership is all about knowing where I am right now, that’s the hardest part, because I think a lot of us have an idea of where we want to go, where we want to be, but you can’t get where you want to be until you know exactly where you are.

And I have tried to have a ruthless curiosity about my own strengths and weaknesses, my own blind spots so that I can be more aware of where I am right now so that I can lead myself out of where I am to, ultimately, where I want to go.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. So, now, you said knowing yourself and where you stand right here, now, in the moment is the hardest part, and you try to be ruthlessly curious. So, I’d be curious to – I’m curious about your curiosity – specifically in terms of what were the processes by which you came to find the answers to those questions?

Clay Scroggins
I do a lot of live communication in front of groups and audiences, and I love asking that question, Pete, to a crowd, is just say, “Hey, what is the easiest way to find out when you don’t know?” And it’s usually peoples gut-level response which is great, you know, “Well, you ask somebody. How do you know what you can’t see in the mirror?” Because none of us can really see ourselves clearly in the mirror. We’re all biased towards ourselves, and the easiest way to find out, “What do I really look like?”

This is one of the hardest things about getting married or being in a meaningful relationship is that other person oftentimes is a mirror to ourselves, which is hard, you’re like, “Wow, I never knew my breath smelled as bad as you say it smells,” or, “I never knew I had that little tick that you say I have whenever I meet someone new,” or whatever it is. But asking someone is the greatest way.

So, for me, my last job change, I left one of our campuses that has about 50 people that work there, and I just sent three simple questions, I just made a Google Form and asked three questions to all 50 people. And not everybody filled it out, but maybe, I don’t know, half of them did. I said, “Hey, here’s three questions. Number one, what do you feel like I’m good at? What do I do that inspires you?” to say it in another way.

“Second question, what am I not good at? What bothered you about me?” I think actually is what I said. “What bothered you about working with me? And then, number three, what are my blind spots? What do I not see about myself?” And it was amazing how basic and simple that process was but it was, I mean, to say it was life-changing might be a little strong, but it was genuinely I felt some significant breakthroughs in my own life that things about myself that I knew but I was hoping no one else saw.

People said, I mean, one of the themes was, “We feel like whenever you’re leading a meeting we don’t really feel like you’re prepared for the meeting.” And I was like, “Well, you’re right. I’m not usually prepared because I can think off my feet pretty quickly and when you can you rely on that too much which is not always great.” So that really changed me, it made me go, “Okay, I can be more prepared for meetings.”

A number of people said, “Hey, when we’re on one-on-ones with you it feels like you’re not always listening.” And it’s true, I have a hard time focusing listening. So, one of the things I did is I started spacing my meetings out. I pull a little space in between them to give myself a chance to have a breather.

Pete Mockaitis
Makes all the difference too. You listen better I found. I’m with you there.

Clay Scroggins
It was so helpful because it allowed me to take a little walk around the building and then walk back in the next meeting, and I had a little more mental clarity. And then the other thing was they said was, “It feels like you’ve moved ahead. You’re thinking about the next thing,” which is very common. But, anyway, all of those things just helped me identify things in my life that I wouldn’t have identified if I hadn’t asked. And now that I know where I am I can know how to lead myself better. But I would’ve never have chosen to lead those areas until I identified them.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s perfect. Now, on this Google Forum, was it anonymous?

Clay Scroggins
Oh, I’m sorry. I had a friend execute it essentially. So, I had a friend send it out. I say, “Hey, I think I sent an email to a number of people so you’re going to get an email from so and so, and I’ve asked them to send this form and they’re going to compile the results.” Yeah, just to make it anonymous because you spend half the time trying to figure who said what which is not good.

Pete Mockaitis
Yeah, absolutely.

Clay Scroggins
You go, “Yeah, that sounds like Johnny.”

Pete Mockaitis
I wonder if there’s like a piece of software that is just like, “Okay, paraphrase this paragraph so they can’t tell it’s from me.”

Clay Scroggins
Right, because, like you said it, yeah.

Pete Mockaitis
But I know that it’s great. Especially if they know that you mean it and you care about it, and I think it’s so cool to offer an example. Like, “For example, someone so gave me this feedback which is very helpful because I’ve been trying to work on that and I found some improvement.” And so, it’s like, “Oh, he means it.” And I’ve noticed that thing, too, now that you mentioned it. Okay. Very cool. So, leading yourself is where it starts. And where do we go from there?

Clay Scroggins
So, I saw recently, I still haven’t got a chance to listen to it but I’ve meant to, but you had a podcast on positivity. That was my second behavior that I tried to, you know, I just decided, “Hey, I want to choose positivity. I want to be a person that drops the negativity and the cynicism,” which, it’s crazy, but I don’t know. I can lean there very easily.

And I just decided that more important than my education, my ideas, whatever talent I may have, my energy is the best thing that I bring to the team that I work on. And we’ve all seen this. You’ve seen people that you work with that can change the climate of a room because of their energy. And if that’s true of them then it can be true of us as well, that we all have that potential.

The hardest thing about working, to me, is having to bring it every single day. I remember being in my 20s thinking, “Good grief, when do we get spring break? When does summer happen? Have we taken summer off?” Because it’s exhausting to have to bring it every single day. But the truth is that’s the best thing I have to bring, is the energy that I have.

So, instead of being a 40-watt bulb, I’ve really tried to be a 100-watt bulb. And the hardest time to choose positivity, to me, is when you’re being handed a decision that you didn’t get to weigh in on but you’re being asked to buy into it. Patrick Lencioni, a quote from The Advantage, he says, “People are more likely to buy in when you allow them to weigh in,” which I think is so true. It’s a great truth and axiom about the way we should lead other people.

The problem is most of us who are not in charge are being handed decisions all the time that we didn’t get to weigh in on, and we’re like, “What idiot made this decision and asking me to make it work? This is terrible. It’s a dumb process. It doesn’t work.” But what I’ve just learned is that it’s in that moment that I have a decision to make, “Am I going to take this and make it better and actually make it work? Or am I going to sit on my hands and be angry and sit back and watch this fail?”

And more important than making the right decision is owning the decision and making it right. I really believe that’s possible, that you own a decision that you don’t even agree with fully but you can own it with such positivity that you can make it work, and we’ve all seen that. The best companies in the world aren’t the best companies because they have the best ideas; it’s because everybody is leaning into the same idea. And I think that’s possible.

Pete Mockaitis
And I like that metaphor, the 40-watt bulb and the 100-watt bulb. I was curious with your cover. It’s got these three light bulbs, and one of them is illuminated. It’s not the one in the front. Is that the metaphor you’re going with?

Clay Scroggins
That is, yeah. And it’s a little bit like how the Counting Crows got their name. It’s like one little lyric from one of their B-side songs or something. But that was the attempt, was just to give a little nod to the light bulb metaphor.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. I dig it. And so, when you say it’s exhausting to bring it every day, so how is it that you are expending energy to be positive? Sort about smiling and such. So, like what are those sort of little choices that you’re making over the course of the day to choose and exude and radiant the positivity?

Clay Scroggins
Well, here’s something that just has helped me, is it hit me one day that I’ve got days where I love my job and I’ve got days where I don’t love my job. And I think I was in one of those days where I wasn’t loving it, and I had the thought, “Am I going to be in this job forever?” And I started realizing, “Well, of course not.” I’m 37 years old, there’s no way I’m going to be in this job forever, and neither will you.

In fact, I bet 98% of people listening to this podcast, you’re not in the last job you’ll ever have. If you don’t like your job that’s good news, you know. But I think, on the flipside, recognizing that if this were the last job you ever have, can you be content enough with this job to enjoy it, to choose to enjoy it? Most of us are fairly fortunate to be able to earn a living and support ourselves and help out other people.

I think it’s a great place to be and to go, “I’m content enough in this job that if it is the last job I ever have I’m going to give it all that I got because when I leave this job I want people to be surprised. I want them to go, ‘Wow, we had no clue that you were thinking about leaving. You were so bought in.’” But what’s the alternative? “Oh, he was half in, half out. We kind of always thought he was about to leave.” That’s not going to cultivate influence.

Pete Mockaitis
Right.

Clay Scroggins
And, on the flipside, I think there’s a lot of hope just to know that if you don’t like your situation today you’re not going to be in it forever. There will be a shelf life to the job that you’re in. And so, you can be hopeful knowing that there’s a better future that there’s something else in your future, but you may as well buy in today because it’ll help your future if you choose to be positive about what you’re doing today.

And if you can figure out how to do that, it’s a skill that will help you the rest of your life, “How can I choose to believe the best about the people that I work around? How can I believe the best about my boss? How can I go into this with good intentions not accusing other people of trying to ruin my world? But, instead, he’s trying to do the best he can do. She’s trying to do the best she can do, and I’m going to choose to be positive about this situation. And it will, ultimately, cultivate influence for you if you choose to do that.

Pete, I was speaking to a group of virtual assistants. It’s an amazing company. You can hire somebody for 10 hours a week to be a virtual assistant for you.

Pete Mockaitis
May you drop the name. I’ve used several of these companies.

Clay Scroggins
Sure, yeah. It’s called BELAY, B-E-L-A-Y.

Pete Mockaitis
I haven’t used that one. Okay. Cool. Cool. Continue.

Clay Scroggins
Anyway, so I’m in the middle of talking about choosing positivity, and this lady – I’ll never forget this moment – she’s over on the side, and she just blurts out, she goes, “That’s so inauthentic!” And, honestly, it caught me off guard, and I was like, “Dang! She’s kind of right. Like that is inauthentic,” because you can’t just walk around being positive about things that you’re not positive about, that you don’t feel great about.

But, then, fortunately, in the moment, I had the thought, “Well, hang on a second, we’re not talking about how to be true to yourself right now. We’re talking about how to cultivate influence, and you can get excited about something that you’re not actually that excited about without being dis-ingenuine. We’ve all done it. And your boss, I guarantee you, your boss wants you to be excited about what you’re working on.”

“And when you become a boss, or maybe you currently are a boss, you want the people on your team to be excited about what they’re working on. And if they’re not, you want them to talk to you about it so you can at least help them understand why you’re excited about it.” And I think that’s a better way to cultivate influence.

Now, there might come a time where you go, “You know what, I just can’t fake this any longer,” but I do think there are times where when I choose to be excited about something and see the best in it, I end up finding the best in it and I end up actually getting excited about it, and it’s amazing how we can lead ourselves to do that.

Pete Mockaitis
Certainly. Yeah, inauthentic, you know, it’s interesting because that word is both so heavy and so loaded.

Clay Scroggins
It is.

Pete Mockaitis
And, I mean, in a sense, I guess, there is a measure of inauthenticity in terms of, “I don’t feel like this but I’m going to try to dig it.” Well, hey, you have an infant now, another one in your life. I imagine there are times you don’t feel like tending to…

Clay Scroggins
You’re exactly right, Pete. That’s right.

Pete Mockaitis
… to the sweet angel’s needs.

Clay Scroggins
That’s right.

Pete Mockaitis
But does changing a diaper or whatever make you inauthentic? I’d say, my hunch is, I guess my interpretation on that point, it’s about in terms of faking it.

Clay Scroggins
That’s right.

Pete Mockaitis
I guess you’re being authentic to a higher value of yours which is to be a loving father or a compassionate human being, a disciple of Jesus, a lover of neighbor, whatever your role or identity is. So, you’re authentic in that realm and what are you is a higher authenticity than being “true to your desire,” yeah, in the moment.

Clay Scroggins
That’s right. That’s a great way to put it.

Pete Mockaitis
But I guess I’d wrestle with the same question myself in terms of, “Yeah, I don’t really feel like talking to this person because I think they’re kind of weird, and I would have a whole lot more fun talking to this other person over there. So, am I being inauthentic by like pretending to be interested?” And I think, in one way, yeah, I don’t actually care what this person has to say, that happens. I care about what all my podcast guests have to say profoundly, by the way, that’s why I’ve chosen them, so, Clay, you’re off the hook.

Clay Scroggins
Right. You’re playing solitaire as well while I’m talking.

Pete Mockaitis
“Well, let’s check out Belay, huh? Let’s click around.” But, in a higher sense, you know, “Hey, I’m being authentic to the person that I’m trying to be in terms of a generous kind, loving human being.” So, anyway, that’s how I have navigated that tension. But, yeah, I feel the concern is real and it’s cool that you have some candid audience members who will get you real good.

Clay Scroggins
I did appreciate that, you know. I was like, “Thank you for your honesty.” As opposed to just giving me a kind head nod, you know. So, thank you.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s good. Okay. So, after leading yourself and choosing positivity, where do we go from there?

Clay Scroggins
So, I love the combo of these middle two behaviors because there are a lot of people listening right now that you’re not wired for positivity. You’re wired for results. You’re wired for progress.

Pete Mockaitis
All right, yeah.

Clay Scroggins
You come to a meeting and you see all the things that we need to do that aren’t getting done. In my world, I sit in a lot of evaluation meetings because Sunday happens every seven days, every week, and so on Monday we sit there and evaluate, “How did it go yesterday? Did we like what happened? Did good things happen?”

And we have a lot of people that want to talk about all the good things, and then there’s a lot of people that sit there and go, “Okay, let’s move on from the good things. Let’s talk about how to change this and make it better,” because of just the way you’re wired. A lot of people, when you hear about choosing positivity, it kind of makes you, I don’t know, sick to your stomach, because you think, “Oh, come on. Like am I supposed to walk around like with my head in the clouds going, ‘Oh, this is so great. Everything is so awesome’? Like those Legos in the Lego Movie.”

You don’t have kids just yet, Pete. But have you seen the movie?

Pete Mockaitis
You know, I haven’t but we had a podcast guest talk about the creation of the Lego Movie, Jennifer Riel and about how they agonized over how to get that made.

Clay Scroggins
There’s this little song in the movie that they sing over and over again, “Because everything is awesome,” because they’re trying to basically brainwash the Legos. And I think a lot of people think, when they hear that point of choose positivity, they’re supposed to walk around just everything is awesome all the time, as if that alone cultivates influence. And it does in and of itself, but when you combine it with the skill of thinking critically I think it creates a really powerful leader with or without authority.

I know, for me, someone passed me this article one time about millennials, which I hate all the articles being written about millennials, but it says, “Millennials – are they misguided optimists or rainbow-puking unicorns?” I thought, “What a great word picture! A rainbow-puking unicorn.” And that’s the way people see positive people sometimes.

But the truth is that is if you can combine the posture of choosing positivity with the skill of thinking critically, you can really become a powerful synergistic leader who’s making a significant difference in a really positive way wherever you find yourself, whatever seat you’re in. So, thinking critically really is a powerful skill. I think it’s really simply the ability to notice things, question things, and connect things.

To observe things, to be curious and question things, to figure out how they work, and then to make connections between variables that are being changed and the outcome that you’re looking for. And everyone of us can get better at this skill. That’s the great thing about skills; skills are things that we can improve upon but we have to practice in order to do that.

And so, I think part of the reason why, in my own life, I have a harder time sometimes thinking critically is because I’m not practicing it because I’m either too busy, I either haven’t given myself enough space, mental space to be able to step back and think about my job, or I’ve squeezed out those opportunities. I think the phone is probably the greatest competitor.

The smartphone is probably the greatest thief of critical thought that there is because in the moments when we used to sit back and think about how to make things better, now we just aimlessly scroll through random Wikipedia articles about how rockets are made or whatever.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, that’s a little more productive than some options on your smartphone – Wikipedia.

Clay Scroggins
That’s good, yeah, than playing something.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, yeah, I think I was kind of stuck when you mentioned, okay, every Monday you have a chat about how things went at church services on a prior Sunday. And I was like, “Well, maybe that’s part of how you were ranked the largest church in America in 2014, 12,000 people?” Hotdog! I thought, “Well, how does that happen?” And I guess that’s part of how it happens in a way.

I don’t know of many people in many organizations who are putting that much regular thought and iterative repetition on making something better. Like, do it, reflect upon it, then do it again, reflect upon it, do it again. I think that’s a pretty powerful formula for excellence right there. Could you share maybe some of those questions that you ask, that you drill into when you’re thinking critically to surface these insights and how to do better?

Clay Scroggins
Well, that’s interesting, Pete, to hear that because I’ve never thought about that being odd.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s culture for you.

Clay Scroggins
It really is, I know. It’s so much a part of our culture that I’ve never even noticed it. But we are so passionate about one of our values as a team is make it better. I mean, that’s really what we’re looking for in employees at every level. It doesn’t matter if you’re an intern, we want you to walk in, in fact, we ask interns a lot of questions because they’re walking in with fresh eyes.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s good.

Clay Scroggins
And they represent future generations, and so we want to know from them, “Hey, what did you see that we’re doing that’s kind of weird?” Because it’s so easy to just get so inundated with your own world that you don’t see kind of like the fact that I fail to even realize that evaluation meetings every week might be a bit much perhaps, or maybe a good thing. I don’t know.

But, yeah, the key to learning to think more critically, I think, is to figure out, as basic as this is, “What are we trying to do? What’s the goal here?” And then to start there and go, “Okay. Well, in our case, what we’re trying to do is we’re trying to get people to take steps. We want everybody who watches a message, or sits in a room for one of our church services, to take some kind of step metaphorically, figuratively-speaking, toward being a better person, toward helping someone else, toward looking more like Jesus, toward a growing relationship with God.

And so, when we step back and go, “Okay. Well, that’s what we’re trying to do,” then to try to be mentally present in the environment and go, “Okay. How is this going? What did we do that became an obstacle? What did we do that helped with that?” And then just trying to be as curious as possible in trying to notice things, question things, and connect things.

But, honestly, the greatest enemy is time. We just don’t, we very rarely do this. I ask people usually and in live environments, “Hey, when do you have your best ideas?” Do you know what the number one answer is, Pete?

Pete Mockaitis
Shower.

Clay Scroggins
A hundred times out of a hundred, people say, “The shower.” It’s crazy. And so, because I’ve Googled it, I’m an expert on this, evidently there is research that says that is the number one answer, and that it’s actually true. There’s something about the mundane task of the shower that actually allows our brain to function well and actually think things.

But, honestly, a lot of people say, after the shower, they’ll say, “Oh, driving to work,” “Laying awake at night,” “Doing yard work,” “Working out of the gym,” all of these kind of mundane physical tasks that we do that kind of free up our minds to be able to work. Well, here’s what I’m trying to do in my own life, is I’m trying to go, “Okay. Well, instead of having to wait until tomorrow morning when I take another shower, or instead of having to go try take a shower in the middle of a work day to have a great idea, like surely there’s some practice that I can learn something from it and put those in place.”

And so, for me, it really is about time and space, it’s about creating some space in my calendar to think about how to make what I’m doing better. And so, for me, it’s been waking up earlier in the morning, giving myself more time in the morning to actually just sit at my desk in front of an open notebook, or an open Word document, or an open Evernote file, and say, “What’s on my schedule today? What’s on my calendar? How can I make it better? How can I help the person that I’m going to interact with? How can I help solve the problem that we’re facing? How can I help fix this situation that’s in front of us?”

I really believe that if you can try to do that in a positive hope-filled “I’m trying to help other people” kind of way, it really can create some influence for you wherever you are, whatever seat you’re in. So, I think it’s a powerful behavior to try.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. I dig it. Well, Clay, tell me, is there anything else you want to make sure to mention before we shift gears and hear about a few of your favorite things?

Clay Scroggins
You know, where I land the book is I got done with a lot of the content, I thought, “You know what, I just envision someone sitting there reading this going, ‘I need to go have a hard conversation with my boss because I see things that I think need to change, or I have ideas that I’ve been holding onto, or I feel like I’ve been sitting back and not engaging as much as I want, and there’s some reasons why.’”

And so, I wrote a couple chapters on having a hard conversation with your boss which, to me, that’s one of the most difficult things to do, is, “How do you setup a time or walk in your boss’ office and have a challenging conversation?” So, that was a lot of fun to write about and, as people have read the book, it’s been one of the things that people have commented on most, is, “Hey, that was super helpful.”

Because I’ve tried to give just, “Here’s a game plan. Before you just walk in there and say, ‘This sucks. You’re stupid. I hate this,’ like let’s put a little thought into it, let’s get a little game plan on how to do that well.” So, I really hope that that’s helpful for people as they process how to challenge up because that’s not as easy to do.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Well, so I can’t let that go. If you give us a quick tip or two associated with how to challenge up well and effectively, let’s hear it.

Clay Scroggins
I mean, the first thing I try to do is I try to declare my intentions right up front. We’ve all read books on conversations, I would imagine. One of the most crucial ingredient to a difficult conversation is safety. People got to feel safe. And so, if you walk in, and it’s crazy to think, “Why would my boss be threatened by me?” But your boss is human, and maybe you intimidate your boss, or maybe you bother your boss. Who knows?

But if you can, right up front, declare your intentions, and say, “Hey, whatever you can say that’s most true, I really appreciate what we’re working on here, and I can tell that you really care about it. And I just want to let you know that no matter what we talk about here, I just want to let you know that I think you’re a really great leader,” or a great person, or, “You’re a nice person,” or, “I appreciate how hard you work.”

Anything we can do to try to declare our intentions, and say, “I don’t want to ruin your day. I’m not trying to tear this thing apart. I just had a couple ideas on how maybe we can make it better.” I think it goes a long way to help the relationship what I have found. And it’s something that I would want people to do for me because you can’t catch people off guard with some challenging conversation, I think, unless you state it up front, “Hey, I’m for you. I want you to win in life. I want you to do well. I want you to do good things in life.” I think it’s just a helpful thing to begin with.

Pete Mockaitis
Yes, I like that. Cool. Okay. Well, now, could you share with us a favorite quote, something you find inspiring?

Clay Scroggins
Yeah, I don’t know where I read this, but I read this awhile ago, and it’s been sitting near my desk. But Thomas Watson, former CEO of IBM in the mid-20th century, said, “Nothing so conclusively proves your ability to lead other people as what you do on day-to-day basis to lead yourself,” which is so actionable and helpful to me because I just think, “You know, instead of being frustrated at what the opportunities I’m not getting or how I’m getting passed over, or whatever I don’t have, I’m going to pick up the mantle to lead myself well today. And if I do that, then it will conclusively prove that I have the ability to lead more.” So, I love that quote.

Pete Mockaitis
All right. And how about a favorite book?

Clay Scroggins
Favorite book. Well, I’m obligated to say the Bible, Pete.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay.

Clay Scroggins
Kidding. Kidding. Kidding. No, I would say probably Leadership and Self-Deception.

Clay Scroggins
It’s a little book. It’s a short read. It’s kind of like Lencioni, kind of written like a fable a little bit, like a lot of his books are. But it’s terrific and it helps you create better relationships with people that you work with which, ultimately, I think is going to create more success for anyone of us in our careers. But it’s a fantastic little read. We read it recently with our leadership team here, and it was very helpful.

Pete Mockaitis
Well, thank you. Excellent. Perfect. And how about a favorite tool?

Clay Scroggins
I mean, Evernote is probably what I use more than anything. It’s amazing how, I mean, I have a number of different screens that I use, so just to be able to pick up any screen and have what you need is terrific, so I’ll go with Evernote.

Pete Mockaitis
Okay. Very good. And how about a favorite habit, something that helps you be awesome at your job?

Clay Scroggins
You know, stating out loud what I’m grateful for has been something I’ve been trying recently, which I really enjoy. I heard recently someone say that, “Suffering ends when gratitude begins,” which I think is so true, and it is amazing the power of just being grateful. It’s hard to be unhappy in life and be a really grateful person. Joy and gratitude usually go hand in hand. They’re like peanut butter and jelly sandwich kind of thing. So, I try to start my day by just saying, “Hey, here’s a couple things I’m grateful for,” which feels weird to do in the car by myself but no one else is around, so.

Pete Mockaitis
That’s all good. And is there a particular nugget, a piece that you share that seems to really resonate, connect with folks, a Clay original quotable gem?

Clay Scroggins
Gosh, my favorite statement or, I don’t know, kind of the big idea of the book is that influence always outpaces authority. I really believe that. I believe that instead of waiting on authority or instead of leveraging authority, influence is just far more powerful. So, I really hope that whoever is listening, wherever you’re sitting today, whatever you’re doing, that you can allow yourself to cultivate more influence.

Because it will allow you to help someone else today and create more progress and try to make somebody else’s life better. And I think that, ultimately, is what anyone of us are wanting to do is to try to help somebody else. It’s the greatest joy in life. And so, if you can figure out how to cultivate more influence, it outpaces authority all day, every day.

Pete Mockaitis
Cool. And, Clay, if folks want to learn more or get in touch, where would you point them?

Clay Scroggins
I’m on Instagram and Twitter @clayscroggins, and then I have a website ClayScroggins.com that has a weekly newsletter or weekly email that I send out that really has got some great interviews that I’ve done with some terrific leaders both in business world and also the non-profit world on this topic. So, I’d love to keep in touch, say hello. I love this idea of this podcast, Pete, and I love the name because I’m a big fan of How-To names, How To Be Awesome At Your Job.

Pete Mockaitis
Oh, cool. Thank you, yeah. And I think it makes it clear like this is what we’re trying to do here.

Clay Scroggins
Sure. That’s right.

Pete Mockaitis
And do you have a final challenge or call to action you’d issue to folks seeking to be awesome at their jobs?

Clay Scroggins
Yeah, I would just say, hey, there’s a lot of people today that probably don’t like their boss. I don’t know, I’ve just interacted with a lot of people because of this whole process, who say, “Hey, that sounds great, but I just don’t like my boss at all.” But I just want to encourage you today that just because you don’t like your boss doesn’t mean you can’t get anything done, that people for centuries and centuries have gotten a lot done working for awful people.

And one of the great things, one of the hard things, but great things working for a boss you don’t like is learning to take notes of things that you don’t want to replicate when you become a boss. And maybe the very reason why you’re in the position you’re in is to learn some really difficult lessons, and that’s hard when you’re in the moment, but it’s just the way life works that resistance is what creates strength.

And so, if you feel resistance from a terrible boss, just know that there’s an opportunity for you to create even more strength because that’s the way the world works. And that might not be fun but I hope that’s encouraging to whoever is listening that if you don’t like your boss it doesn’t mean that you can’t learn anything and it doesn’t mean you can’t get anything done today.

Pete Mockaitis
Awesome. Well, Clay, thank you so much for taking the time to chat. This has been powerful stuff. I wish you all the best, and that your Sundays keep getting better and better and better with all the thoughts that you put into them.

Clay Scroggins
Thank you.

232: How to Be a Better Leader by Being More Positive with Brenda Bailey-Hughes

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Brenda Bailey-Hughes says: "You do have the power to choose your thoughts... to choose what you see within your day... so choose very wisely."

Professor Brenda Bailey-Hughes explores the scientific connections between positivity and being a better performer at work.

You’ll Learn:

  1. The real science behind the power of positivity
  2. How to halt compulsive worrying
  3. Power words for positivity

About Brenda

Brenda Bailey-Hughes teaches communication and leadership skills at the Kelley School of Business undergrad program. She also teaches global leadership and emerging markets for Kelley Direct, the working professionals’ MBA program.

She’s authored 8 LinkedIn Learning courses. She specializes in communication training  and coaching for Fortune 500 executives –  such as P&G, Samsung, Cummins, and John Deere.

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